Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In contemporary society, individuals are considering to reduce the anuual travelling or completely cease the fly journey. This will effect the people's life as well as their bussinesses. From my perspective, I firmly content that this is negative development on person and their business.

Admittedly, people are largely dependent on planes as well as other transpotation systems. When the people are stopped by using air travel, definitely this will imapct on the ecosystem and environment. The environmental degredation significantly decreased lower. The quality of the air will also enhanced. For instance, every time we look at the sky, atleast, two or three planes are see which emiited the carbon dioxde and other detrimental gasses, this can be contibuted to the health problems such as respiratory infections and asthama.

In recently years, the business development is enhanced worldwide and expanded throughout in the world. Most billionear businessmen are travelled by the air for their bussiness meeting or attending the expo in different regions of the world. Air travelling will allow the people commuting from one corner to other, however, when people will not used the air travelling frequently, ultimately, this results in the

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a position—that reducing or stopping air travel is a negative development for people and businesses—and you identify environmental improvements, including cleaner air and fewer emissions. However, the response addresses the comparison only minimally: it does not explain in a balanced way whether those environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and the business point is left unfinished at “this results in the”. The health example is relevant but does not clearly establish the scale of the benefits or weigh them against impacts on individuals. The response is also 58 words below the required minimum, which limits the opportunity to develop reasons and examples. Extend both sides of the comparison and conclude with a direct judgement supported by specific consequences.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a paragraph about environmental effects, and one about business travel. This gives the reader some indication of the intended progression, and phrases such as “For instance” signal an example. However, the ideas are not arranged into a complete argument. The business paragraph ends mid-sentence, and there is no concluding paragraph to bring the comparison together. Connections between claims are also unclear; for example, the shift from reduced flying to “the environmental degradation significantly decreased lower” does not clearly show the relationship. Use a clear sequence—position, benefits, disadvantages, and conclusion—and connect each claim to its explanation with accurate linking and referencing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “ecosystem,” “carbon dioxide,” “detrimental gases,” and “respiratory infections,” which helps communicate the subject. There is also some effort to use more formal expressions such as “contemporary society” and “environmental degradation.” However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choices are frequent enough to make parts difficult to understand, as in “anuual,” “bussinesses,” “transpotation,” and “contibuted.” Some combinations are unnatural or unclear, including “reduce the annual travelling” and “the environmental degradation significantly decreased lower.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. Prefer precise phrases such as “reduce the number of flights” and “lower carbon emissions” over awkward or repetitive wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional construction beginning “when people will not used the air travelling frequently.” However, control is limited, and frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “individuals are considering to reduce,” “the quality of the air will also enhanced,” and “two or three planes are see.” The long sentence beginning “For instance” also joins several ideas without clear grammatical control. Practise reliable patterns such as “are considering reducing,” “will be enhanced,” and “two or three planes can be seen.” Build longer sentences only when you can maintain correct tense, agreement, and punctuation throughout.

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