Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In today's rapidly growing world, travelling is very important part of every business. However, numerous individuals decides to reduce the number of flights they take every year or stop air travelling all together. Although, this step has some demerits for the businesses, merits enjoy clear majory over them.
To commence with, let us unflur multifarious reasons why this decision outweight the disadvantages. First and foremost, environmental benefits. If the usage of the airplanes will reduce, the pollution emittes by the engine of plane will automatically reduce. The carbon emission by plane play a major role in increase of global warming. Therefore, public should use local trasports like bus and train to cover small distance. Moreover, airplanes use large amount of fuel which also effect our national resources. For instance, India export huge amount of crude oil, which effects the nation economy.
Furthermore, there are many birds who died because of the planes. As we know that planes fly at very high speed, many birds in the air face many difficulties and many have to deal with accidents because of planes, which is very bad for the rare species. On contrary, there are many businesses in which they have different partners in different locations. In this case they have to fly even across the borders for the meetings. For example, company like google who has many headquaters in world, employs of these type of companies have to travel alot to run their business.
To encapsulate, it can be conclude that eventhough there are some disadvantages if reduce the air travel, advantages of this step outweights its demerits. Everyone in this world is adjustable, as meeting can be held online, work can be discuss on the phone but damage to environment and revival of rare species is not easy.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear: you believe the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and you address both sides by discussing pollution and fuel use alongside the need for business travel. The points about online meetings and protecting rare species help support your conclusion. However, some ideas are less fully developed than others. For example, the claim that aircraft cause bird deaths is not explained with a clear example or indication of how significant this is, while the business disadvantage is illustrated mainly through Google employees travelling. Develop these points with more precise reasoning, and explain more directly how reduced flying affects individuals as well as businesses, to make the response more complete and convincing.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall structure: an introduction states your view, the body paragraphs present environmental benefits and a business-related disadvantage, and the conclusion restates your position. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Furthermore,” and “To encapsulate” make the progression easy to follow. At times, however, linking is mechanical or the relationship between ideas is unclear. “On contrary” introduces the business point abruptly, and the paragraph moves from bird deaths to international meetings without a clear transition. Some references, such as “this step” and “these type of companies,” could also be more precise. Use transitions that show the contrast or connection between points, and organise each paragraph around a clearer central idea.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “carbon emission,” “global warming,” “crude oil,” and “rare species,” and you attempt more formal expressions such as “To commence with” and “To encapsulate.” This gives you adequate language to discuss the topic, but inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling sometimes weaken clarity. Examples include “unflur multifarious reasons,” “merits enjoy clear majory,” and “air travelling all together”; these are difficult to interpret or do not sound natural. There are also spelling errors such as “headquaters” and “alot.” Aim for precise, natural combinations rather than ornate phrasing, and check spelling and word forms carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You use both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and subordinate clauses: “If the usage of the airplanes will reduce…” and “Although… this step has some demerits…”. Most of your meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction. For instance, “numerous individuals decides” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “it can be conclude” uses the wrong verb form. “Travelling is very important part” also needs an article. In addition, the opening “Although” clause is punctuated as a separate sentence fragment. Practise checking agreement and verb forms, and make sure dependent clauses are joined to a complete main clause.
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