Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, more people are flying to grow their businesses. Many people have argued to reduce the numbers of times they fly or to stop, while others believe that it is important to fly. From my perspective, I believe that it is more important to fly because it helps in developing business and also explore other cultures.

On the one hand, travelling impacts on environmental. Firstly, air pollution increases. People are flying more, which increases the number of flights. Due to this, many health-related issues are increasing in the world. For instance, in India, many childrens have a problem of asthama and the reason behind it is pollution. This results lower quality of life and higher pollution. Furthermore, low requirement of fuels. If people change their transportation from air to trains or buses, fuels can be less used. Air crafts needs high fuels in comparison to trains and buses. By reducing this, much fuel can be saved.

On the other hand, travelling is more important because all individuals have right to explore the world as well as other cultures. It is important to visit other countries, by which we can explore other cultures and the quality of life. Moreover, it also helps in promoting business. Travelling to other countries creates global connections, which is beneficial for business. For instance, people can promote their business by visiting different countries. This results in higher income and global connections.

In conclusion, although by reducing the number of flight or stopping it is beneficial for environment, I believe it is more important to fly because it helps in promoting business and also to explore the world.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view: you believe flying remains important because it supports business and cultural exploration. You also recognise environmental benefits, mentioning air pollution and fuel use, so the response addresses both sides of the question. However, the task asks whether those benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and your position is asserted rather than fully weighed against them. The environmental discussion is brief, while the advantages are also supported mainly by general claims such as “higher income and global connections.” The example about asthma does not clearly establish how flying specifically contributes to the problem. Develop each side with more precise explanation and examples, then explicitly compare the scale of the environmental gains with the costs to individuals and businesses.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for environmental effects and advantages, and a conclusion that restates your view. This gives the reader a basic route through the argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: “Furthermore, low requirement of fuels” does not clearly connect to the preceding point, and the explanation that follows is difficult to interpret. Linking phrases such as “On the one hand” and “Moreover” help, but some connections feel mechanical, and “This results” is used without a consistently clear reference. Improve cohesion by making each paragraph’s main point explicit, linking explanations directly to that point, and using clear references rather than repeating broad claims.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main ideas, with relevant terms such as “air pollution,” “global connections,” and “promoting business.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. For example, “argued to reduce” is not a natural way to describe people’s choices, and “low requirement of fuels” does not express the intended idea clearly. There are also spelling and word-form errors, including “asthama,” “childrens,” and “Air crafts.” Aim for more precise topic vocabulary and check common collocations and spelling. This would make your argument clearer and more natural without changing its basic ideas.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and some attempts at more complex structures, including “Although by reducing the number of flight or stopping it is beneficial for environment…” and clauses beginning with “which.” The overall meaning is usually understandable, but errors recur in agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence construction. Examples include “Air crafts needs,” “all individuals have right,” and “This results lower quality of life.” The opening sentence, “more people are flying to grow their businesses,” also does not clearly express the intended relationship. Work on accurate subject–verb agreement, article use, and complete sentence patterns, especially when using introductory clauses. More reliable control of these forms would make your ideas easier to follow.

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