Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Todays, the environmental issue increase dramatically which caused by many different factors and airplanes on of them. Few individuals think that if they cut out their tours frequency by plane or even stop totally to prevent our atmosphere from being dangerous. I believe that people face more drawbacks to doing this in their businesses while air will get more harmful with the help of other factors like cars and other transportation sources which they use in contrast of air planes, also airlines face more financial issues which automatically effect related people who work in airports and with different airlines.

By stop using planes for travel, people use different sources for moving one place to other which automatically grow pollution in our srounding in the form of dangerous air moleculs. For example, in urban areas mostly person use private vehicles like bikes,cars and buses to go their jobs and doing all activies which require travel, this results in bad air quality and many diseases caused by harm oxygen.

On other hand, airline businesses shutdown when people prefer travel by road rather than plane. A large amount of employees those work for these airlines will effect because they start reduce working force to manage their expenses. In addition, the economy growth and reputation of country and company hit so bad locally as well as internationaly because people from other countries think person not like that company to travel with.

In conclusion, by minimizing use of planes for travel not contributes in low environment damage because other things take part to boost this such as travel through private vehicles and local transport. Also economical damage to companies those operate these airlines and attached employees.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a position that reducing air travel brings disadvantages for individuals and businesses, while arguing that it may not substantially improve the environment because people use other transport. This addresses the central comparison, and the examples of private vehicles and airline employees are relevant. However, the environmental case is not fully explained: the claim that road travel increases pollution needs qualification, since the impact depends on the type and number of journeys. The business discussion also focuses mainly on airlines, with little explanation of effects on travellers or other businesses. Your conclusion repeats the position but does not weigh the environmental benefits against these costs clearly. Develop both sides and make the comparison more explicit to strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. The paragraphs broadly separate environmental effects from business effects, and signposts such as “For example,” “On other hand” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. However, progression within sentences and between ideas is sometimes difficult to follow. For instance, the introduction combines pollution, transport alternatives and airline finances in one long sentence, while the final sentence introduces several points without clearly connecting them. Some linking phrases are used mechanically or inaccurately, and references such as “this” do not always identify a clear idea. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, then explain and support it in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “environmental issue,” “air quality,” “employees,” “expenses” and “economy growth,” so the reader can identify the subject and your main concerns. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making meaning unclear. Examples include “airplanes on of them,” “dangerous air molecules,” “harm oxygen” and “reputation … hit so bad.” Spelling errors such as “srounding,” “moleculs” and “internationaly” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural combinations and check spelling carefully; for example, describe “air pollution” and “harmful emissions” rather than inventing less familiar phrases. This would make your argument clearer and more appropriate to an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “which” and “because,” and you use a basic paragraph structure to present your ideas. However, complex constructions are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence structure frequently make the reader work to understand the meaning. For example, “the environmental issue increase” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “By stop using planes” does not use the correct verb form after “by.” The sentence beginning “A large amount of employees those work” also has several grammatical problems. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly formed supporting clause, then check agreement and verb patterns before adding complexity.

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