Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many aspects of the way people dress today are influenced by global fashion trends.

How has global fashion become such a strong influence on people's lives? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Different ways in which people are dressed this days are results of global fashion trends. In this essay I will be explaining why this is a negative development with reasons.

Most individuals today, are influenced by new trending wares in the stock market not, by their own choices but as a result of the rising pressure amongst different people in the society, which tends to bring negative behavior in the lives of the young adults. For example, Peer pressure; In a situation where one lacks a strong ground and having boundaries or limits to certain lifestyles, there's always a possibility of falling victim and moving with the trending things in the market most especially social media.

Globally, social media tends to have a great influence on alot of people, both young and old. Most fashion ideas and wares today are mostly gotten from the media. However, the negative impact has outweighed the positive impact therefore, being a major reason why individuals always has unnecessary needs to this trendy wares or fashion ideas. For instance; people pressured from the society can make mistakes such as; unnecessary spending, fraud, misplaced priorities and, lack of savings for the future, if not taken care of with careful choices

In general, it is advised to have a strong ground of discipline and hardwork to avoid being influenced and falling yo the negative effects the media and society can have on a person. There should be personal boundaries and limits to lifestyles that can lead to a fall and results to instability in finances.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear negative view, and your discussion of peer pressure, social media and financial consequences is relevant to the question. However, the task asks both how global fashion became influential and whether this is positive or negative. The negative judgement is stated, but the explanation of how influence spreads remains general: social media is mentioned, without explaining mechanisms such as influencers, advertising, or international access to trends. The examples of fraud, spending and poor saving are also listed rather than developed, and the positive side is not considered. To strengthen the response, explain the causes more specifically and extend one or two examples to show their effects. This would make the position and supporting ideas more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a concluding paragraph. The ideas generally move from social pressure to social media and then to personal consequences, so the reader can follow the overall argument. You also use linking expressions such as “For example,” “However,” and “In general.” At times, though, the connections feel mechanical or unclear. The second paragraph begins with social media but then shifts to financial harms without a clear transition, while “therefore” does not clearly connect the preceding claim to the result. Some sentences contain several ideas joined by commas and semicolons, making relationships harder to follow. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example directly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “peer pressure,” “social media,” “personal boundaries,” and “misplaced priorities.” These phrases help communicate your concerns about fashion trends and their effects. However, the range is limited in places, and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “trending wares in the stock market,” “strong ground,” and “falling yo the negative effects.” Repetition of “negative impact,” “influence,” and “fashion ideas” also limits precision. Aim for more natural topic-specific expressions, such as “fashion trends,” “consumer pressure,” and “online influencers,” and check that each phrase fits its context. More precise vocabulary would make your argument clearer and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning “where” and “if,” and the main ideas are usually understandable. However, errors occur frequently and sometimes make sentences difficult to process. For example, “Most individuals today, are influenced” has an unnecessary comma, while “individuals always has” has a subject–verb agreement error. The sentence beginning “Most fashion ideas and wares today” also shifts awkwardly between plural and singular forms, and several long sentences are joined with punctuation that does not clearly separate complete ideas. Practise building accurate sentences with one main point each, then add subordinate clauses carefully. Check agreement, articles, and punctuation when editing.

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