Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many aspects of the way people dress today are influenced by global fashion trends.

How has global fashion become such a strong influence on people's lives? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modern era of style and fashion, many aspects of the dressing and outfits are being affected and influenced by the ongoing fashion trends in the world. As for me, i think this is somehow negative development. This essay will describe the reasons how this happened and and why it is not a positive approach.

To begin with, the world has become a global village. With the advancements in social media platforms and marketing stratagies, it has become very easy and accessible for sellers anf brands to advertise their products. As soon as a person open their social media app, the advertisement appears on their screen. For exsample, a New York based brand does not have to put billboards in lahore in order to attract customers from the city.They just have to spend a few bucks and the ad will appear on their screen.Furthermore, people think they look more sharp in pictures if they wear international brands and follow global trends. These two important factors along with some other factors have contributed to this.

On the other hand, this is negatively impacting the socities and people. There is this peer pressure where everyone wants to look more expensive and wealthy by carrying and wearing most fashionable and lastest designs. The people who can't afford feel low of themselves and this affects them psychologically. Furthermore, capitalism and consumerism is making it worse. For examople, an outfit worth a few hundreds in being sell for thousand of dollars just because people are buying it and making it a luxury, thus increasing its demand. Brands are charging whatever they want to.

In conclusion, I think people should wear appropriately and to their taste. But its not very altruistic to buy things just because they belong to a certain brand. People should wear locally made clothes and do not waste their money on such expensive brands because its not worth it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question: you explain the influence of social media advertising and the desire to look fashionable, then give a clear negative view based on peer pressure, self-esteem and consumerism. The New York brand advertising in Lahore is a relevant example, and your conclusion reinforces your position. This meets the task well, but the explanation of how global fashion spreads could be extended beyond advertising—for instance, by showing how influencers, celebrities or international entertainment shape choices. Some claims, such as people feeling inferior or brands charging more, are relevant but would benefit from clearer explanation or a specific example. Developing these points more fully would make the response more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining the influence, a paragraph discussing negative effects, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the main stages. The ideas generally progress logically, and the example about advertising in Lahore supports the first body paragraph. However, some linking is mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “Furthermore,” and the opening paragraph promises to explain the issue without clearly previewing the main points. The phrase “These two important factors” is understandable but could refer more precisely to the preceding ideas. Use a wider range of natural transitions and clearer references to strengthen the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “global village,” “social media platforms,” “peer pressure,” “consumerism,” and “luxury.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and the meaning remains clear despite some inaccurate or awkward expressions. For example, “look more sharp” and “feel low of themselves” are not natural collocations, while “lastest designs” and “stratagies” show spelling errors. “Altruistic” is also not the right word for the intended point about buying branded goods. Aim for more precise, natural phrasing and check spelling carefully; this would make your vocabulary more flexible and controlled without changing the substance of your argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional example (“if they wear international brands”) and a cause-and-effect construction beginning “just because.” Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries remain noticeable. Examples include “As soon as a person open” (the verb should agree with “person”), “an outfit … is being sell,” and the run-on spacing in “city.They.” The opening also contains a repeated “and,” and “i” should be capitalised. These issues do not generally prevent understanding, but they limit accuracy. Review subject–verb agreement, passive forms and punctuation, then proofread each sentence.

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