Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many aspects of the way people dress today are influenced by global fashion trends.
How has global fashion become such a strong influence on people's lives? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Global fashion trends have to make impact on public for modern dressing today. Global fashion can be effect in both ways on people lives in positive and negitive development. The positive developments about fashion are to bring modern ciothes and also making people smart or beautiful.The negitive developments about it can reduced the traditions clothes and also have to make a wastage of money.
About global fashion trends, the people can be seen smart and beautiful, It also bring to make bussiness from this.For example, the people who wear old clothes will appear not good and also effect thier personality or not to have impress to others with this type of clothes.
The negitive impact of fashion it will also damage the traditonal clothes and have to make less importance of culture clothes in society and it also make people to wear new clothes of different fashion and then they spent a lot on it and it was also a wastage of money .An example about it was that the people want to wear new clothes ethier they will wear it for some time but they will have to wear new clothes with time to time and spent a lot of money on that.
In conclusion, the development of clothes will have to modernized the public with the modern world and it also effects as the lost of money on wearing different types of clothes which will have to be introduced
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
You address both the influence of global fashion and whether its effects are positive or negative, identifying appearance and business as benefits and cultural loss and spending as drawbacks. However, the task asks specifically how global fashion became so influential, and this part is largely missing: the essay does not explain drivers such as social media, advertising, celebrities, or international brands. Your position is also unclear because you present both sides without stating which overall view you support. The examples about old clothes affecting personality and repeatedly buying new clothes are relevant but general and not fully explained. The response is 9 words below the required minimum, which further limits the development of your ideas. Develop the causes of fashion’s influence and state a clear overall judgement.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The body paragraphs broadly separate positive and negative effects, so the reader can follow the main topics. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and several ideas are repeated, particularly the claims that people look smart or beautiful and spend money on new clothes. Linking phrases such as “For example,” and “In conclusion” provide some signposting, but connections between claims are often unclear; for instance, the relationship between looking good and creating business is not explained. Some sentences run together, making the sequence harder to follow. Organise each paragraph around one clear point, explain how each example supports it, and use referencing and transitions more precisely.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use a basic range of topic-related vocabulary, including “global fashion trends,” “traditions clothes,” “culture,” and “wastage of money,” which allows the reader to identify the main subject and concerns. However, vocabulary is repetitive and often imprecise, so some phrases strain understanding. Examples include “have to make impact on public,” “modern ciothes,” and “damage the traditonal clothes”; these do not express the intended ideas naturally. There are also frequent spelling errors, such as “negitive,” “bussiness,” and “thier.” Build a more accurate set of collocations for discussing influence, clothing, culture, and consumer spending, and check spelling carefully. More precise word choices would make your points clearer without requiring overly advanced vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the overall meaning can usually be understood. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries. For example, “The positive developments about fashion are to bring…” has an incomplete and awkward structure, while “it also bring to make bussiness” has incorrect verb agreement and construction. In “they spent a lot on it,” the tense does not fit the general point being made. Punctuation also causes problems, as in the long sentence beginning “The negitive impact of fashion…” where several ideas are joined without clear boundaries. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then connect them with controlled subordinate clauses.
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