Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many aspects of the way people dress today are influenced by global fashion trends.

How has global fashion become such a strong influence on people's lives? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

it is generally argued that the prevalent fashions trends all over the world shap individuals choices in dressing themslve. the main reason attributed to this phenomenon are globalisation and the infliunce of celebrities. in my view, it is entirely a negative growth, considering the loss of individuality.

To beginswith the prominent cause of prevelance. in other word, the world is connected more than ever, which has faciliated the exchange of information, and fashion is no exeption. Due to this the propaganda of self-ecxpressionthrough clothing in the west ha smigrated to all other region. Not only has this shaped peoples mind sets in enbrassing oneself with attires, but this notion is blrring the lines between real and virtual elf. for instance, it has become rather common for people to prefer trends started by influtr

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify two relevant influences—globalisation and celebrities—and state a clear view that the development is negative because it reduces individuality. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: globalisation is briefly explained, while the celebrity influence is named but not developed, and the negative effects are not supported with a complete example. The final sentence breaks off at “trends started by influtr…”, so the argument and conclusion are missing. The response also falls short of the required 250 words, leaving both parts of the question substantially unanswered. To improve, explain how media or celebrity promotion spreads trends, then develop your view with a specific example and a concluding summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening paragraph gives the topic and opinion, followed by a paragraph beginning “To beginswith” that introduces a cause. Linking expressions such as “in other word,” “Due to this,” and “Not only” show an effort to connect ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the second paragraph shifts from global connectivity to self-expression and then to the distinction between real and virtual life without explaining the links. The unfinished final sentence also leaves the paragraph and response without closure. Use clear paragraph purposes, develop one point at a time, and connect each explanation directly to the question.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “globalisation,” “exchange of information,” “self-expression,” and “individuality.” These choices show an effort to discuss fashion and its wider effects. However, spelling and word-choice errors are frequent and sometimes make the meaning hard to recover, as in “prevelance,” “faciliated,” “enbrassing,” and “blrring.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear, such as “propaganda of self-expression” and “real and virtual elf.” The range is limited in this short response, and the unfinished word at the end further interrupts communication. Proofread spelling carefully and choose precise collocations, for example, “promotion of self-expression” and “blur the boundary between online and offline identities.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a few more complex structures, including “which has facilitated the exchange of information” and the inversion in “Not only has this shaped…”. These show some willingness to vary sentence forms. However, control is inconsistent: “the main reason … are” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “To beginswith the prominent cause” is not a complete, correctly formed sentence. Missing or incorrect articles and plural forms also appear in phrases such as “all other region” and “peoples mind sets.” The final sentence is incomplete, so its grammatical structure cannot be followed. Build accurate simple sentences first, then use complex clauses selectively; check agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries.

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