Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many aspects of the way people dress today are influenced by global fashion trends.

How has global fashion become such a strong influence on people's lives? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowadays, fashion trend are influenced day by day in human lives.While some people believe that this is a positive deveopment, i believe that there are some negative developments.

To begin with, some positive developments about the fashion. One of the main reason is that people are interested in fashion because they wants to look beautiful and atteractive personality. For example, most of the humans wants to famous and make money in his career. As a result, they follow the fashion trends and create more interst in fashion. In recent years, the fashion have to provide opportunity to make money and chance to famous actor or actress. There are some biggest reasons about why fashion influenced on humans.

On the others hand, there are some negative effects of fashion. Most of the people they are poor but they wants to become a famous person although they do not have enough money. They take a loan for enter in fashion because without money enterance is very difficult in fashion industry. If anyone join the fashion industry, they compromise his privacy. For example, when a person enter in fashion industry may be he b

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You attempt to discuss both the influence of fashion and whether it is positive or negative, and you state that you see negative effects. However, the response only minimally addresses the question: it does not explain clearly how global trends became influential, and several points shift to people becoming famous or entering the fashion industry rather than how trends affect everyday lives. The positive side is also difficult to identify because the examples about earning money and becoming an actor are not clearly connected to the task. Your final example is cut off, leaving the argument incomplete. The response is 59 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop relevant reasons and examples. Explain mechanisms such as social media, advertising, and international brands, then support a consistent judgement with specific examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response into an introduction and two body paragraphs, with signposts such as “To begin with” and “On the others hand.” This gives the reader some indication of a positive-versus-negative structure. However, progression within the paragraphs is weak: ideas about looking attractive, becoming famous, earning money, and joining the fashion industry are placed together without clear links. The opening says you believe there are negative developments, but the first body paragraph presents positive points without explaining their relationship to that position. Some linking phrases are inaccurate or repetitive, and the final sentence stops abruptly. Use one clear main idea per paragraph, connect each example directly to it, and finish with a conclusion that restates your view.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a small set of relevant terms, including “fashion trends,” “fashion industry,” “privacy,” and “loan,” so the general topic is usually recognisable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are unclear or unnatural, such as “create more interst in fashion,” “chance to famous actor or actress,” and “enterance is very difficult in fashion.” Spelling errors, including “deveopment,” “atteractive,” and “interst,” also reduce clarity. Some vocabulary is repeated rather than varied, particularly “fashion” and “famous.” Build a more precise topic vocabulary and check word forms and collocations; for example, explain that trends spread through “social media platforms” or “global brands” rather than relying on vague references to fame.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a few longer structures, including “While some people believe…” and “although they do not have enough money,” but most sentences rely on simple patterns, and errors occur frequently. Examples include subject–verb agreement in “fashion trend are” and “people … wants,” pronoun agreement in “his career,” and missing or incorrect articles in phrases such as “enter in fashion.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent: there is no space after the first full stop, and the final sentence is incomplete. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete sentence construction first, then add controlled complex sentences using “because,” “although,” and “as a result.”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.