Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You have enrolled in an evening course but you have found that you are too busy to continue and would like to take the course next term instead.

• explain the situation and why you cannot continue the course

• say what you would like to do about your studies

• ask for advice about what you can do about the situation

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear sir,

i am writing to express my concerns about my study because of my busy schedule. Recently, i have enrolled at national art school in evening session. Although i have keen interest to learn art, however i have more responsibilities related to my work in turn of which i can not continue with this course. Because i have work at bank as an accountant so i have a number of responsibilities to meet with customers and calculate the cash and other important tasks including attend seminars and take interviews from begginers that is why i have not managed my time between work and study. Therefore, i have more worried about my passion because art is my hobby and i want to learn it because it would helps me to get relieve from stress. So, i request to you if you have any solution about my problems and different time sessions, i would be grateful if you could let me know.

I look forward your response.

Yours faithfully,

Gagan

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You explain that work responsibilities prevent you from continuing, and you make clear that art is important to you as a hobby and a way to relieve stress. You also ask about possible solutions and different session times. However, the request to take the course next term is not stated directly, so a central part of the situation remains unclear. Your reasons for being busy are listed, but the letter does not clearly say what arrangement you want for your studies. State explicitly that you hope to defer your enrolment until next term, then ask whether this is possible and what steps are required. This would address the task more fully and develop your request.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter follows a recognisable format, moving from the reason for writing to your work commitments and then to a request for help. Linking expressions such as “Although,” “Because,” and “Therefore” show an effort to connect ideas. However, several points are packed into one long paragraph, and the sequence is sometimes difficult to follow: the explanation of your job duties runs into the reason you value art. Some connectors are also used awkwardly, such as “Although … however,” while “that is why” repeats the causal link. Use separate paragraphs for the situation, your preferred study arrangement, and your request, and choose fewer, more accurate linking phrases to make the progression clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the situation, including “responsibilities,” “customers,” “seminars,” and “passion,” and the reader can understand the main message. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “calculate the cash.” However, several word choices and collocations are unnatural or imprecise, including “in turn of which,” “more worried about my passion,” and “get relieve from stress.” Spelling and capitalisation also need attention, for example “begginers” and lowercase “i.” Aim for standard phrases used in formal requests, such as “due to my work commitments,” “defer my enrolment,” and “relieve stress.” This would make your vocabulary more precise and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including a concession with “Although” and a reason introduced by “Because.” These attempts show some range, but complex sentences are often not controlled accurately. For example, “Although I have keen interest … however” combines two contrasting structures, and “it would helps me” has an incorrect verb form. There are also recurring issues with articles and sentence construction, as in “I have work at bank,” and the final sentence needs “look forward to your response.” Break the long explanation into shorter sentences, check subject–verb forms and articles, and use one clear structure for each relationship between ideas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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