Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is often debatable whether smoking should be banned or not. While the sale of cigerattes comtribute to the economy, I personally believe the drawbacks are far more and the sales of it should be limited.

The primary detrimental effect of smoking is that it create numerous health issues to active smokers. In other words, it is irrefutable that the particle of tobacco in ciggerates are the major cause of Cancer and Asthama. It directy impact the lungs and kidney, and make them weaker. For instance, more than 60% of smokers have symptoms of either Cancer or Respiration problems. As a result, human life is getting affected day by day because of the unrestrictory sales of smoking products.

Furthermore, smoking not only cause negative impact on active smokers, but also have serious effect on passive smokers. To elaborate, when a person smoke, he or she release smoking particles in that particular area; people beside that person have to reluctlanty breathe into that air, which affect as same or even more to the passive smoker. For example, doctors find Cancer or other breathing issues in toddlers, which are the major cause of passive smoking.

In my opinion, due to the severe health hazards, smoking should be forbidden in public areas such as Malls, Busses, Trains, Shopping centres and other places. This would certainly save trillions of human from getting affected by active and passive smoking. Moreover, selling and purchasing Vapes and Cigerrates to teenagers ought to be banned completely. stricter punishments should be implemented to the rule-breakers.

To conclude, although tobacco and smoking products help authories to boost the econonomy of a nation, the hazards of it should not be overlooked. This measure can save the life of childre, adults and even older people. Therfore, I strongly assert that the smoking should be forbidden completely on the public places and new rules on sale ought to related.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you believe the harms of smoking outweigh its economic benefits, and you support restrictions on smoking in public places and sales to teenagers. The discussion of active and passive smoking is relevant, with examples such as toddlers exposed to second-hand smoke. However, the response does not fully resolve the question of whether smoking itself should be made illegal. Your proposed measures focus mainly on public smoking and sales to teenagers, while the conclusion says smoking should be forbidden completely in public places. Explain more directly whether you support a total ban or targeted restrictions, and develop the economic counterargument beyond briefly mentioning its contribution to the economy. Some claims, such as the statistic about smokers and cancer, also need clearer support or qualification.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised into a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, a paragraph proposing measures, and a conclusion. Its progression from health effects on smokers to harm to bystanders and then to possible restrictions is easy to follow. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “To elaborate,” and “To conclude” help signal these stages. To make the flow more natural, avoid relying on formulaic transitions and strengthen the links between claims and their explanations. For example, the paragraph about passive smoking moves from exposure to toddlers’ illnesses without fully explaining the evidence connecting them. Some references, including “the sales of it” and “This measure,” are not fully precise, so readers must infer what they refer to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “detrimental effect,” “passive smokers,” “health hazards,” and “stricter punishments.” These choices show an effort to discuss the issue beyond basic terms. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the writing less clear: “cigerattes,” “ciggerates,” “Asthama,” “reluctlanty,” and “unrestrictory” are examples. Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “the particle of tobacco” and “save trillions of human.” Use standard forms such as “cigarettes,” and check collocations in context. More precise wording for health effects and policy measures would make your argument sound more controlled and persuasive.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in “While the sale … contribute to the economy” and a conditional proposal beginning “This would certainly save…”. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “smoking … create,” “smoking … cause,” and “people … have to … breathe … which affect.” There are also problems with articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, as in “the particle … are” and the lower-case “stricter punishments” after a full stop. Review agreement and article use, and proofread punctuation. More accurate control of these patterns would let your varied sentence structures communicate the argument more smoothly.

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