Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The act of smoking is concerned issue among many nations. It should be totally banned by the government as per individuals; although, I agree with this statement but it only shows results if it controlled by stratergic planning and measures with campaigns and regulations with penalties.

The reasons behind gaining attraction towards smoking is due to media coverage, peer pressure and availabilities at local stores easily. All social media platforms as well as mobile phone users see the famous celebrities, politicians and youth share images, videos and posts with cigarrattes and other drugs used for smoking without any restriction of their age. Furthermore, in university students feel proud by showcasing their smoking style which makes other non-smokers students as inferiority for their status. Smoking infront of others show fashion trends and modern values as per youngsters; however, it create rapport among sttrangers to build relationships. These mentality attract young people to buy and spend money on smoking. The other thing is it available at loval stores, malls ansd even nearby colleges and schools. Even shopkeepers sell everyone without any agerestrictins or following any define guidelines as it hazardous to health. They only have interest to sell to their customers which eventaully make the scenario worse.

To control this act, it need to take several steps such as campaigns and penalties on shopkeepers, manufactures and its distributers. Many schools and colleges make heath clubs to promte healthy habits as well as plays to show hazardous effect on body part after smoking; it aware the smokers as well as non-smokers especially youth to think for a while before purchase cigarratte. Secondly, government could impose heavy duties on raw materials of tobbacco and smoking materials. It will rise to unaffordable prices for buyers. Imposing fines via strict checking of the distributors and shopkeepers; it inevitabley diminishes the demand among the minors.

In a nutshell, smoking is injurious to health and rather than only to be banned; it controlled via systematic plans, measures, awareness and strong regulations with fines as I believe. It is not affordable by everyone if it costs high and vigilant by governments.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you support strong control of smoking, but argue that a ban should be accompanied by planning, awareness campaigns and penalties. You address causes, including peer influence and easy access, and propose relevant measures such as school health clubs and higher tobacco duties. This covers the task and gives the reader a consistent view. However, the response focuses more on why people start smoking and how to reduce it than on whether smoking should be made illegal, so the extent of your agreement could be explained more directly. Some points, such as the claim that smoking creates rapport, are asserted rather than supported. Develop the legal argument with a specific example and clarify whether you favour a complete ban or tighter restrictions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on reasons for smoking, a paragraph on possible controls, and a conclusion. Sequencing within the main paragraphs is generally understandable, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “Secondly,” and “In a nutshell” help show relationships between ideas. This gives the essay a coherent foundation. At times, however, the links feel mechanical or the references are unclear. For example, “it” in “it need to take several steps” does not clearly identify who should act, and the long list of causes in the second paragraph moves quickly from social media to university culture and shop access. Use clearer topic sentences and divide or connect related points more deliberately; this would make progression smoother and cohesion less dependent on repeated linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “peer pressure,” “heavy duties,” “distributors,” “regulations,” and “hazardous effect.” These choices show an effort to discuss both social influences and policy responses. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning harder to follow. Examples include “act of smoking is concerned issue,” “availabilities at local stores,” “make other non-smokers students as inferiority,” and “vigilant by governments.” Several spellings, such as “cigarrattes,” “stratergic,” and “tobbacco,” also reduce accuracy. Build a reliable set of collocations for this topic and check spelling carefully. Prefer precise, natural phrases over ambitious wording when you are unsure of the expression.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “although,” “which,” and “as well as.” This gives some variety, and the main ideas can usually be understood. However, control is inconsistent: errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles and verb forms recur and sometimes make the reader work to interpret a sentence. For instance, “although, I agree with this statement but” combines two contrasting structures, while “it only shows results if it controlled” is missing a passive verb form. “These mentality attract” also has a subject–verb agreement error, and “it need to take several steps” has an unclear subject and incorrect verb form. Practise building accurate sentences first, then add subordinate clauses; check each sentence for a clear subject, a correctly formed verb and appropriate punctuation.

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