Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-07-23
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is an undeniable fact that in this era, technology is flourishing by leaps and bounds in each and every field. Nowadays, many individuals are doing smoking, so that smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal . In this piece of writing I will shed light on its many reasons it along with my opinion in upcoming paragraphs.
To commence with the abundant reasons that's why in this era 50% people are do some smoking and drugs. when they are do some drugs after that they are not doing work and all days they are sleeping and use other parson tell abuse word and get so many diseases, like, mouth cancer, high BP. heart diseases and so many more diseases coming to drugs people. So smoking is very dangers serious cause. This is very bad habit and they do not increase their life. For example, last year government was counducted by survey, 60% people are doing smoking and drugs by fashion after that they are do some bad work and rape cases is increase day by day. So I give some suggestion to government please close this all drugs and smoking all world.
On the other hand, In this era some people are every time do smoking and drugs. After that their lungs and mouth cancer is increase. They do not survive properly
To conclude, although there are many raesons of its, all people can survive without smoking and drugs. Smoking is not good for health, so that, all people are save their health and enjoy their life
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the health risks of smoking and suggesting it should be illegal. However, the development of ideas is limited and often repetitive. The arguments provided, such as the link between smoking and criminal behavior, are not well-supported or logical. The position is clear, but the essay lacks the depth required for a higher band. The content is somewhat tangential, as it conflates smoking with illegal drug use, which weakens the focus on the specific prompt regarding smoking. To improve, you should focus on developing clear, logical arguments specifically related to the health and social impacts of smoking.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often disjointed. Cohesive devices are used, but they are frequently inaccurate or mechanical (e.g., 'To commence with', 'After that'). The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of the argument. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks logical flow. To improve, focus on using transition words more naturally and ensuring that each sentence builds logically upon the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which limits the ability to convey complex ideas. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'doing smoking' instead of 'smoking' and 'abuse word' instead of 'abusive language'. Some terms are used incorrectly, which occasionally impedes communication. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your range of vocabulary and focus on using words in their correct context, particularly regarding health and social issues.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. Examples include '50% people are do some smoking' and 'government was counducted by survey'. These errors are persistent and often make the text difficult to read. While there is an attempt at complex sentences, they are almost always faulty. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement before attempting more complex grammatical forms.
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