Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is stated that that smoking can cause serious illnesses and it should be made illegal. I agree to this statement to a major extent. Further detailed answer is mentioned in ensuing paragraphs.

One of the most important reasons is that smoking can cause various health issues, and sometimes it can be fatal. Cigarette smoking contains a nicotine, which deposited in the trachea and alveolus of the lungs during smoking leads to severe restrictive lung diseases such as, asthma, bronchiectasis and interstitial lung effusion. For example, recent study revealed that, chances of lung cancer in smokers is five times higher than non-smokers. Furthermore, smoking not only harms smokers, but also to the passive smokers due to inhalation of air in the lungs. As a result, problems like, breathlessness, heart diseases and obesity are increased.

To overcome these serious illnesses, smoking should be made illegal. The government should imposed strict policies to ban the smoking. By taking these steps, health issues and serious illnesses could be significantly reduced. Furthermore, banning smoking in public places can also help non-smokers. Consequently, smoking made illegal solves many health-related issues and benefits not only smokers but also to the society.

On the contrary, some extent people believe that smoking is not the only thing that can cause serious illnesses. Alcohol consumption has more serious consequences on health compared to smoking and it should not be made illegal. Occasional smoking allows people to relax temporary from their workload, and allows individuals to focus more on work.

To conclude, although some believe that smoking is not the only problem that cause serious illnesses, the effect of it on health is far more serious and life-threatening than benefits. Therefore, I majorly agree that it should be made illegal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. You have provided relevant reasons for your agreement, such as health risks and the impact on passive smokers. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The counter-argument paragraph is a bit brief and could have been better integrated into the overall argument to strengthen your position. While the main points are clear, some claims, such as the link between smoking and obesity, are not fully supported or explained. To reach a higher band, ensure that every point made is logically connected to the central argument and fully elaborated with clear reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'As a result', and 'Consequently' to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Additionally, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, and each paragraph has a central topic, which helps the reader follow your argument. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive markers and ensure that the progression of ideas between sentences feels more natural rather than formulaic.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including topic-specific terms like 'trachea', 'alveolus', and 'interstitial lung effusion'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'smoking made illegal' instead of 'making smoking illegal' and 'imposed strict policies' instead of 'impose strict policies'. Some phrasing is slightly unnatural, such as 'relax temporary'. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise academic collocations and ensuring correct word forms will significantly improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('a nicotine'), verb forms ('government should imposed'), and subject-verb agreement. For example, 'smoking not only harms smokers, but also to the passive smokers' is grammatically awkward. Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some unnecessary commas, such as in 'problems like, breathlessness'. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and article usage. Increasing the variety of error-free complex structures will help you move up the band scale.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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