Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this contemperory era, smoking has become increasingly common among people. Without a doubt, it results is causing various serious health problems, putting person's life in life threatening situations. I completely agree that it should be made illegal. This essay will explain my reasons for my viewpoint.

Firstly, smoking has become part of many individual's daily routines. The main reason behind this is that masses are having very stressful life due to ongoing personal or professional issue and smoking helps them to relieve stress. For example, in Canada many males and females smoke in order to feel relaxed after every two to three hours while working. Although, they know its consequences, still continue it because they do not want to keep them stressed. Therefore, smoking should be made illegal in every nation, so that no one can sell it and people can get rid of this.

Other significant reason is that there is not enough awarness about the dangerous diseases effecting masses health. In some parts of world, the governments are not paying attention to this and it is resulting is causing lungs cancer and other type of long term illnesses. For example, in India every other young child is getting addicted to drugs which is totally vanishing their power of thinking about themselves and families. Furthermore, many shops are selling cigarettes to even a child, which is wrong ethically. Thus, government should introduce some strict laws to stop this.

To conclude, I firmly believe that smoking if very dangerous for health and eco-system because of its bad bacterias and legal authorities should definitely take some serious measures to tackle this issue.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of making smoking illegal. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While the first body paragraph attempts to explain why people smoke (stress relief), the argument that this justifies a total ban is not fully explored or logically connected to the solution. The second paragraph introduces the issue of awareness and drug addiction in India, which drifts away from the specific topic of smoking. The ideas are relevant but lack depth and focus, often relying on generalizations. To reach a higher band, you should ensure each paragraph directly supports your main argument with more focused, logical reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Furthermore', and 'To conclude' to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the transition 'Although, they know its consequences, still continue it'. Additionally, the progression of ideas within the second paragraph is disjointed, moving from smoking awareness to drug addiction in India, which disrupts the logical flow. Improving the use of referencing and ensuring that each sentence builds clearly upon the previous one would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'vanishing their power of thinking' and 'bad bacterias'. You also repeat words like 'smoking' and 'illegal' frequently. While the meaning is clear, the range of vocabulary is limited to common terms. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific collocations and synonyms to express your ideas with greater sophistication and accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'it results is causing' (instead of 'results in'), 'individual's daily routines' (should be plural 'individuals''), and 'effecting masses health' (should be 'affecting' and 'the masses' health'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles would significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

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