Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Diseases caused by smoking has become a widely debatable issue these days. Smoking is a bad habit and it is linked with many irreversible life-threatening diseases. Medical science still has not discovered the diagnoses of these fatal diseases. I firmly believe that smoking should be made illegal and offenders should pay a heavy price for breaking the rules.

To start with, smoking not only affects the people who are smoking, but it also affect those who are inhaling the second hand smoke caused by smoking and the process is known as passive smoking. This is because tobacco products are mixed with harmful chemicals which are released in the environment at the time of smoking and can affect nearby non-smoker. In addition to that, the smoke caused by products are extremely dangerous for children. A study shows that smoke caused by the tobacco products can cause serious health issues to new born babies and pregnant women. Therefore, smoking should be banned and made illegal.

Moreover, the majority of the deaths through out the world are caused by lung cancer. There are numerous studies which clearly establish strong links between lung cancer and smoking. A survey shows that number of deaths caused by smoking is increasing year by year and the government should take strict steps to improve the situation. Also, smoking affects the fertility rate in men and women by causing serious reproductive illness. The main ingredient in smoking product is nicotine which cause mental problems and severe addictions which affects especially the youth of the world. Hence, smoking should be avoided and made illegal.

To conclude, I strictly believe that smoking causes serious irreversible illness whose diagnoses are still not discovered and it should be banned. It affects everyone from a baby to an adult. It has adverse affects on unborn children and cause permanent illness. The number of deaths by smoking is increasing over the years and nicotine which is a major component in smoking causes permanent mental issues like dementia.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt clearly, maintaining a consistent position that smoking should be illegal. The ideas are relevant, focusing on passive smoking, health risks to children, and cancer rates. However, the development is somewhat repetitive; for instance, the point about 'irreversible illness' is mentioned in the introduction, the body, and the conclusion without significant expansion. To reach a higher band, you should provide more nuanced arguments, perhaps acknowledging counter-arguments or discussing the practical implications of a total ban, rather than simply restating the health risks multiple times. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments could be more varied.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points. You use cohesive devices such as 'To start with,' 'In addition to that,' and 'Moreover' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there is a tendency to repeat phrases like 'made illegal' at the end of every paragraph, which affects the flow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph builds upon the previous one rather than just listing facts would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'irreversible,' 'life-threatening,' 'passive smoking,' and 'reproductive illness.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, you write 'diagnoses of these fatal diseases' when you likely mean 'cures' or 'treatments,' as a diagnosis is the identification of a disease, not the solution. Additionally, 'adverse affects' should be 'adverse effects' (noun vs. verb). While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, more precise and sophisticated word choices would elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Subject-verb agreement is a recurring issue, such as 'Diseases... has become' (should be 'have become') and 'smoke caused by products are' (should be 'is'). You also have errors with articles and pluralization, such as 'affect nearby non-smoker' (should be 'non-smokers') and 'number of deaths' (should be 'the number of deaths'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic agreement and article usage would be highly beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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