Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-10
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is widely recognized that any kind of smoke is injurious to health which is considered to be the main cause of dangerous illness to humankind. I firmly agree with the notion that the business of making any kind of cigarette should be completely banned and strict regulations should be implemented.
On the one hand, there is no wonder that using tobacco for pleasure is widespread across the world. And it is clearly affecting people’s health later in their life causing cancer and other deadly diseases. In addition, UNICEF has conducted nationwide surveys in the United States of America where they found out that, 3 out of 10 people are struggling with illnesses, which is roughly 30% of the population of the United States of America. Although with the modern era technology, doctors these days have found a way to fight with cancer but they are not being successful. Thus It should be avoided as much as possible.
On the other hand, there is no way it should not be possible to even make illegally produced. And to make sure , the government holds the key to secure their people. For instance, the government should take full responsibility for any kind of tobacco. Although some of tobacco is still being used to make medicine but it contracts shouldn’t allow to go any private company. Furthermore, it is a necessity to implement strict guidelines to whoever is or making tobacco products by implementing high fines for rest of their life.
To conclude, people indeed need to spread awareness to prevent smoking in society as well as , the government should organize a comprehensive plan to ensure hold they will take full responsibility that production is not being sold illegally.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of banning tobacco. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While the first body paragraph attempts to support the argument with statistics, the reference to UNICEF is likely inaccurate and the logic regarding medical advancements is somewhat confused. The second body paragraph is underdeveloped; the argument about government control and the mention of tobacco in medicine are disjointed and lack clear logical progression. To improve, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single, well-explained reason that directly supports your thesis, and avoid using potentially fabricated statistics, as this weakens the credibility of your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused. For example, the phrase 'there is no way it should not be possible to even make illegally produced' is confusing and lacks clear logical connection to the previous paragraph. Additionally, some transitions, such as 'And to make sure,' are abrupt and do not effectively link ideas. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the internal flow within paragraphs is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing, which hinders the overall coherence of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'the business of making any kind of cigarette' and 'it contracts shouldn’t allow to go any private company.' These errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'injurious' and 'regulations,' the overall range is limited, and the phrasing often sounds unnatural. Focusing on learning collocations and using more precise academic vocabulary would significantly improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include incorrect article usage ('the United States of America'), subject-verb agreement errors, and awkward sentence construction, such as 'whoever is or making tobacco products.' Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of commas before conjunctions. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors is noticeable and prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed correctly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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