Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-10
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It is widely recognized that any kind of smoke is injurious to health which is considered to be the main cause of dangerous illness to humankind. I firmly agree with the notion that the business of making any kind of cigarette should be completely banned and strict regulations should be implemented.
On the one hand, there is no wonder that using tobacco for pleasure is widespread across the world. And it is clearly affecting people’s health later in their life causing cancer and other deadly diseases. In addition, UNICEF has conducted nationwide surveys in the United States of America where they found out that 3 out of 10 people are struggling with illnesses which is roughly 30% of the population of the United States of America. Although with the modern era technology, doctors these days have found a way to fight against cancer but they are not being successful. Thus it should be avoided as much as possible.
On the other hand, there is no way it should not be possible to even make illegally produced. And to make sure the government holds the key to secure their people. For instance, the government should take full responsibility for any kind of tobacco. Although some of tobacco is still being used to make medicine but the production rights shouldn’t allow to go to private companies . Furthermore, it is a necessity to implement strict guidelines to whoever is or making tobacco products by implementing high fines for rest of their life.
To conclude, people indeed need to spread awareness to prevent smoking in society as well as the government should organize a comprehensive plan to ensure hold they will take full responsibility that production is not being sold illegally.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of banning tobacco. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While the first body paragraph attempts to provide evidence, the reference to UNICEF is vague and lacks a clear link to the argument. The second body paragraph is problematic; the argument regarding government control and the distinction between medicinal and recreational use is confusing and lacks logical depth. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments are often under-developed or unclear, which limits the overall effectiveness of the response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'In addition', and 'To conclude' are used to guide the reader. However, the flow within paragraphs is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing, such as 'there is no way it should not be possible to even make illegally produced'. This makes the progression of ideas feel mechanical at times. Referencing is generally clear, but the logical connection between the government's role and the proposed ban could be more smoothly articulated.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. There are instances of awkward word choices, such as 'business of making any kind of cigarette' and 'whoever is or making tobacco products'. While the student uses some relevant terms like 'injurious', 'comprehensive', and 'regulations', the range is somewhat limited. The repetition of 'any kind of' and 'government' suggests a need for a broader range of synonyms and more natural collocations to express ideas more fluently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity, such as 'there is no wonder that using tobacco... is widespread' and 'the production rights shouldn’t allow to go to private companies'. Punctuation is generally functional, but there are issues with sentence construction and word order. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. A greater focus on sentence variety and proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement would be beneficial.
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