Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Considering smoking as an illness disease, it should be banned. Government ought to introduce some laws to make smoking as an illegal consumption. I agree with the term that smoking should be illegal, I clarify the reasons behind this in further paragraphs.

To commence with, nowadays youngsters are smoking as a trend, and there are several number of electronic smoking is available in market. For instance, individuals use vape which is an electronic smoke. However, there is an age limit for buying Cigarettes from shops, electronic smoking is convenient to buy for teenagers also. which is bad impact on our future generations, because they use the drugs as a trend without knowing its affects. Therefore, it is vital that cigarettes should be made illegal, in order to keep our youth safe and away from these kinds of drugs.

Moreover, due to excess use of smoking several people died every year. In brief, as using this drug cause abundance of serious health issues such as cancer, and respiratory disease which makes individuals sick and they die. For example, last year WHO conducted a survey regarding number of people die because of drugs, and there studies showed that approximately 76% individuals died due to smoking. As a result, smoking is dangerous which causes numerous hazards, it should be banned.

In my opinion, Smoking is not the only drug which cause serious illness, there are also plethora of drugs which leads to put harmful effects on individuals health, so authorities should take appropriate actions in order to made smoking illegal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of banning smoking. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention the impact on youth and health risks, the arguments lack depth and specific supporting evidence. For instance, the claim that '76% of individuals died due to smoking' is a vague and likely inaccurate statistic that undermines the credibility of your argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that your supporting points are logically extended and grounded in more realistic or well-explained reasoning rather than unsupported data. The conclusion is also slightly repetitive and introduces a new point about other drugs, which is not the focus of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'To commence with' and 'In brief' are used, but the logical flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed. For example, the transition between the discussion of youth and the health statistics in the second paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'this drug' to refer to smoking, which feels repetitive. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words will help create a smoother progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'bad impact' and 'serious illness'. There are also instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'illness disease', 'electronic smoke', and 'make smoking as an illegal consumption'. These errors occasionally cause the reader to pause. To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and precise terminology related to public health and legislation, and ensure you are using words in their correct grammatical context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the clarity of your writing. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'there are several number of electronic smoking is available'), incorrect article usage, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'in order to made smoking illegal'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several comma splices and sentence fragments. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be highly beneficial.

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