Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the recent years, there has been increasing in the number of patients who has serious illness caused by smoking. Therefore, a group of people believe that smoking should be banned. I am totally agree with the given statement, and reasons with my point of view are discuss further in the following paragraphs.

To begin with, the main reason to be made smoking illegal is, the non-smoker will also indirectly inhale the smoke which is more harmful than the native smoker. If a passive smoker will inhale, then it will create same harmful and adverse affect to his body. For instance, a report in Times of India shows that, a similar symptoms have been found related to the lung disease in the patients who never tried to cigarette.

Another reason to enforced banned on smoking is, a gradual decrease in the number of lungs related patients. Provided that, consumer will not get consume products that create smoke, and this will reduce the number of smokers. Hence, less number of patients have lungs and heart related problem.

In contrast, completely banned on the smoking products, resulted financial crisis to the tobacco business and the locally produced raw material. Instead, government should encourage smokers to have limit in smoking rather than making illegal. This will lead have legal right for them to smoke and maintain the local economy.

To conclude, in my point of view, government should be made not legal to consume smoky items which made individuals ill. Moreover, a strict enforcement on selling and purchasing tobacco smoking products lead to more health concerns, especially to the non-smokers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. You have provided relevant reasons for your stance, such as the impact of passive smoking and the potential reduction in health issues. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding the economic impact in the third paragraph is a bit underdeveloped and slightly contradicts your initial stance, which creates some confusion regarding your overall position. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explained with clear examples and that your arguments remain consistent throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Another reason', and 'In contrast'. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For example, the transition 'Provided that, consumer will not get consume products' is unclear and disrupts the logical progression of the argument. Additionally, some referencing is imprecise, making it difficult for the reader to follow the connection between ideas. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words will help create a smoother, more professional flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your meaning, but there are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation. Phrases like 'native smoker' (instead of 'active smoker'), 'smoky items', and 'enforced banned' indicate a limited grasp of natural English collocations. While your meaning is generally clear, these errors prevent the vocabulary from being considered 'sufficiently flexible'. To improve, focus on learning word families and common collocations related to health and social issues, and try to avoid literal translations from your native language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('number of patients who has'), article usage ('a group of people', 'a similar symptoms'), and incorrect verb forms ('reasons... are discuss', 'government should be made not legal'). These errors are persistent throughout the text. While you attempt complex structures, they are often faulty. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice, will significantly improve your score.

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