Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays smoking has become a serious illness due to that reason it is said that smoking should be made illegal. I believe that making smoking illegal has more advantages than disadvantages.

The primary advantage is that, it reduces respiratory illnesses and saves people from dangerous disease such as cancer. This is because cigarette and other items contain tobacco and other ingredients, which potentially cause cancer if someone does smoking for a longer period. For example, in big cities such as Toronto and Hamilton, majority of people suffer from respiratory ailments like Asthma and COPD, due to excessive smoking. Ultimately, it puts more pressure on medical system to treat those people with such ailment, and also required more budget to treat people with cancer disease. Therefore, banning smoking could be positive step towards reducing such illnesses.

Other reason is that, restricting smoking for residents can help them saving some money which can be used for education and other purposes. Because, nowadays, prices of cigarette has sky-rocketed, and having addiction of smoking force individual to purchase that regardless of financial situation. Therefore, smoking is not only causing serious illnesses, but it also causes financial damage to people who are chain smoker.

Although having disadvantages of serious illness, banning cigarettes and other smoking items can negatively impact on tobacco industries in countries such as India and China. Because those industries majorly play an important role in increasing GDP of that country. Hence, restricting them in those region might decline their all over revenue. In conclusion, restricting smoking can be beneficial in cities where people are highly suffering from serious illnesses as it increases load on heath care sector. However, developing countries still rely on those industries, and its a crucial part of their GDP.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all parts of the task and maintained a clear position throughout the essay. You provided relevant reasons for your stance, such as the impact on public health and the financial burden on the medical system. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited; for instance, the counter-argument regarding the tobacco industry is introduced but not fully explored in terms of how it might be mitigated. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully elaborated with more depth and nuance. Overall, the response is relevant and directly answers the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. You use cohesive devices such as 'The primary advantage is that', 'Other reason is that', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or repetitive, and the use of referencing could be more sophisticated. For example, the link between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the health benefits to the economic considerations, which helps the reader follow your argument easily.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'respiratory ailments', 'financial damage', and 'GDP'. There are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'someone does smoking' (should be 'someone smokes') and 'highly suffering' (should be 'suffering significantly'). Additionally, there are minor errors in phrasing, such as 'having addiction of smoking' instead of 'being addicted to smoking'. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Expanding your range of collocations would improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the medical system', 'a positive step') and subject-verb agreement ('prices of cigarette has' should be 'prices of cigarettes have'). Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'Although having disadvantages of serious illness', which lacks a clear subject. You have control over basic structures, but the frequency of these minor errors indicates a need for more careful proofreading and a greater focus on complex sentence accuracy.

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