Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Smoking has become considerably common drug used by people all over the world. It is an undeniable fact that it gives birth to several fatal diseases. Some people argue that they should be penalty on smoking. I agree with this proposal to great extend. This essay will explain certain reason with appropriate examples in subsequent paragraphs.

The major reason smoking should be illegal is that it pollute the breathing air. Smoking contains many chemicals such as nicotine. Which can cause my serious illnesses for example, lungs failure, heart diseases not only to person doing but also people inhaling around them. Therefore, it should be banned to prevents people from being victim. In addition, many people starts doing it for their pleasure of mind. They fall into its addiction very quickly because it is not seemed as inappropriate as other drugs are consider such as alcohol. Hence, individuals particularly young people starts with smoking as it is easy available.

However, this action also has some drawbacks. If it become illegal people are more likely to move to other cheap drugs, which could have much more negative effects. For example, vape or weeds. As a result, banning on drug in not appropriate. strict rule against all kind of drugs should be implemented. There should a limit on amount taken by a person per day.

In conclusion, while prohibiting smoking completely cam improve society's well-being significantly, the availability of other drugs can make it more worse. Thus, rule should be placed to limit the use of smoking.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position on whether smoking should be illegal. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide reasons such as health risks and environmental pollution, the argument in the third paragraph regarding the potential shift to other drugs is slightly contradictory to your initial stance, which weakens the overall persuasiveness. To improve, ensure that your supporting arguments consistently reinforce your main position. The conclusion is a bit abrupt and introduces a new idea (limiting the amount) that was not fully explored in the body paragraphs. Overall, the task is addressed, but the depth of argumentation could be improved by focusing on more cohesive supporting points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'Therefore', and 'However' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For example, the sentence 'Which can cause my serious illnesses' is a sentence fragment that disrupts the flow. Additionally, the use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as 'this action' in the third paragraph, which makes it slightly difficult to follow the logical progression. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that each sentence connects smoothly to the next.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You use some relevant terms like 'fatal diseases' and 'addiction', but there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'considerably common drug' instead of 'widely used substance' and 'pleasure of mind' instead of 'psychological satisfaction'. There are also minor errors in word form, such as 'banning on drug' instead of 'banning drugs'. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary and pay closer attention to how words are typically paired together in English.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('many people starts', 'rule should be placed'), article usage ('the breathing air'), and sentence fragments ('Which can cause my serious illnesses'). The punctuation is generally functional, but the misuse of sentence boundaries is a recurring issue. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from achieving a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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