Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In contemporary globe, the issue of smoking has sparked considerable debate. While some people believe that smoking required as a medicine, others hold an alternative view of smoking. Although smoking is a habit of people, it can affect serious illnesses and should be illegal.

To begin with, there are several reason of smoking is that many people are suffering with health issues and they are not able to walk or run properly. In addition, smoking contents with a various unwanted chemicals like, tobacco. Moreover, Smoking is extremely dangerous because its directly affect to human body. Not only is affecting lungs, but it also effecting to heart which is the significant part of human body. As an epitome, the danger picture shows on the smoking packets that the government should be made illegal. Consequently, a person, who is smoking with so many chemicals would get serious health problem like, heart disease, breathing problem.

Furthermore, there are the main causes of smoking that increasingly smoking may increase the air pollution and it directly affect to the next person of them. Additionally, the government should ban on dangerous goods and products. For instance, if the government made illegal all products, all shoppers would reduce to sell that products rapidly deduction in health illnesses ratio. Therefore, the amount of people can save their lives and family.

To recapitulate, although smoking should be one habit, it affect a human body, air pollution, litter and one of the main issue occurred when the people planning for their family would get numerous challenging. Therefore, the government should be made illegal for public.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that smoking should be illegal. However, the development of ideas is limited. While you mention health risks and air pollution, the arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. For instance, the point about 'danger pictures' on packets is mentioned but not fully linked to the argument for a total ban. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea with specific examples or logical consequences. The conclusion restates your position, but the supporting points could be more clearly synthesised to strengthen your overall argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'Furthermore'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'As an epitome' or 'Consequently, a person, who is smoking'. The progression of ideas is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing, which makes the flow feel a bit disjointed. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words more naturally and ensure that the relationship between sentences is always clear.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate to express your ideas, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices or incorrect collocations, such as 'smoking contents with a various unwanted chemicals' instead of 'contains various chemicals' and 'danger picture' instead of 'warning labels'. You also repeat words like 'illegal' and 'smoking' frequently. To improve, try to use synonyms and more precise academic vocabulary. Focus on learning common collocations to ensure your word choices sound more natural in an IELTS context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('it affect a human body'), incorrect preposition usage ('ban on dangerous goods'), and awkward sentence construction ('the government should be made illegal'). While the meaning is generally understandable, these persistent errors in basic grammar and sentence structure prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that your complex sentences are constructed accurately.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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