Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is argued by some people smoking play an important role to increase health issues that is why it ought to prohibited. I totally agree with this opinion because it put adverse influence on the individuals lives.

To begin with, there are several reasons why smoking must be illegal. First and the foremost, if most of the people smoking, they can suffer from fatal diseases such as cancer, blood pressure and respiratory which put adverse impact on their health in turn of which they would neither concentrate on their work nor earn money. In addition it, it put worse impact on their families. To explain, when parents get smoke at home, children can take breathing there so they can also suffer with smoke as a consequently, they also suffer with breathing issues and lungs cancer.

Moreover, it can not only burden for government but also in hospitals. To elaborate, when individuals would suffer from health problems, they need to better cures for their treatment so lives can be saved that is why high authorities need to spend huge amount of money on their treatments rather than other an essential amenities including education and transportations. Furthermore, it put destructive impact on youngsters future. Because if they smoking, they can not think about their bright future in turn of which they can neither take better study nor participant in any competition which is more necessary for them to develop the pivotal skills. Therefore, regimes should be restricted on smoking.

To conclude, while it would be more difficult for government to ban the smoking, it would be very significant to stop it for making bright future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of banning smoking. The ideas are relevant, covering health impacts, the burden on the healthcare system, and the influence on youth. However, the development is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth in certain areas. For instance, the argument regarding the government budget is a good point, but it is not fully explored. The conclusion is a bit brief and does not effectively summarize the main points. To improve, ensure that each paragraph provides a more nuanced explanation of the consequences rather than repeating similar ideas about health issues.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with,' 'Moreover,' and 'To conclude,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or used incorrectly, such as 'in turn of which' and 'as a consequently.' Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, making the flow feel slightly disjointed. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words will help the essay achieve a more natural and sophisticated progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'get smoke' instead of 'smoke' or 'regimes should be restricted on smoking' instead of 'restrictions should be placed on smoking.' Some terms are repeated, such as 'adverse impact' and 'bright future.' To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring that word combinations are natural and idiomatic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('smoking play', 'individuals lives'), missing articles, and incorrect verb forms ('if most of the people smoking'). These errors are noticeable and occasionally make the meaning slightly difficult to follow, although they do not completely impede communication. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically verb tenses and the use of articles, before attempting more complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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