Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is an undeniable fact that good health is the real wealth for individuals. However, an increasing number of individuals are more inclines towards smoking in recent years. People think whether smoking must be made illegal in the society. I strongly agree because smoking causes serious illnesses.

To begin with, smoking should not be remained legal anymore. As smoking is not good for lungs, people suffer with adverse health problems and which causes a cancer sells in human body. As a result, people are continuously dying at an early age. To cite an example, a recent study by the Oxford University, in London, demonstrates that 6 out of 10 people are dying because of lungs failure every year.

Furthermore, smoking is very expensive. People waste high amount of their earning for buying cigarettes, and it furthers put a strain on their savings. Consequently, it is not only make weak people in health but also make financial unstable. For instance, young people are making more involvements in criminal activities because want to earn extra money for buying drugs.

Apart from this, there are some people who want to quit smoking unless selling smoking products legal, they confront many difficulties for quitting. If government can make it illegal, it may help people to stop or reduce.

To conclude, although some individuals are in a favor of stopping smoking, they cannot do till the see their open selling. So, government should make it illegal and ban it from convience stores.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the essay falls slightly short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the overall task achievement score. While the ideas are relevant, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding criminal activity is a significant leap that lacks logical connection to the topic of smoking. Additionally, the evidence provided, such as the statistic about '6 out of 10 people' dying from lung failure, appears fabricated or poorly recalled, which weakens the persuasiveness of the argument. To improve, ensure all points are fully developed with logical reasoning and meet the minimum word count.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'and which causes' and 'unless selling smoking products legal' create confusion and disrupt the flow of ideas. The transition between the health argument and the financial argument is abrupt. While there is a logical progression, the lack of sophisticated linking words and the presence of awkward phrasing mean the cohesion is not always effective. Improving the variety and accuracy of transition signals would significantly enhance the readability of the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choice and incorrect collocations, such as 'cancer sells' (cells), 'making more involvements', and 'in a favor of'. These errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. The range of vocabulary is limited, relying on basic terms rather than more academic or topic-specific language. To reach a higher band, focus on learning collocations related to health and social policy, and ensure that words are used in their correct grammatical form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('it is not only make weak people'), incorrect verb forms ('smoking should not be remained legal'), and awkward sentence construction ('people think whether smoking must be made illegal'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the high frequency of errors in basic grammar structures prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence patterns and proofreading for common errors like article usage and verb tense consistency.

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