Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Smoking is a serious injuries for health. It has been suggested that selling or buying smoking products ought to be illegal as it can be proved harmful for human life. Therefore, to large extent I show my agreement with given statement and I will explain my reasons in upcoming paragraphs.
To begin with, the most primary factor of not using smoke is the cause of cancer. To explain it, many chemicals contains in smoking products such as Nicotine, and Tar which are responsible for damaging the cells and DNA. For example, research was done by the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention that who do smoke that person is 15-30 times more likely to die with cancer. Despite of it, it influences to the youngsters badly. Because when they see to their celebrities who do smoking then they think doing smoking is a kind of status symbol, due to this government should impose fines on dealers or sellers and make it illegal.
Moving further, in order to protect non-smoker from smokers, it is pivotal to prohibit the smoking legally. To illustrate it, when non-smokers do worker around smokers then that innocent people can inhale toxic chemicals through cigarette smoke, which can harm to them also. However, Government collect huge tax from tobacco product , which helps to boost the revenue and then this amount goes for the betterment of public services. As a consequences, it can put bad impact on the development of public sectors.
In conclusion, no doubt usage of harmful chemical products are not appropriate for common people's health and state should declare it as illegal but in other way it will encourage folks to do black market of smoking.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of banning smoking. The ideas are relevant, such as health risks and the protection of non-smokers. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding the economic impact of tobacco taxes is introduced but not fully integrated into the overall stance, creating a slight contradiction in the conclusion. While the main points are clear, they could be extended with more depth to reach a higher band. The position is consistent throughout, but the final paragraph introduces a counter-argument about the 'black market' without fully reconciling it with the initial thesis.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with,' 'Moving further,' and 'In conclusion,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Despite of it' (which is also grammatically incorrect) and 'As a consequences.' Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between celebrity influence and the call for government intervention feels abrupt. Overall, the progression of ideas is logical, but the flow between sentences could be smoother.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'toxic chemicals,' 'prohibit,' and 'revenue.' However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'serious injuries for health' (should be 'serious health risks'), 'not using smoke' (should be 'not smoking'), and 'do worker' (should be 'work'). These errors do not impede communication, but they limit the range and precision of the language used.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'many chemicals contains' (subject-verb agreement), 'that who do smoke that person is' (clunky syntax), and 'harm to them also' (incorrect preposition usage). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to subject-verb agreement and article usage is required.
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