Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Smoking is one of major causes of serious health issues like hear attack and lung cancer. Some people believe that smoking smoking should completely made illegal, I largely agree with this view, Although The government should make some strict rules and campaigns alongside ban.

There are several reasons why smoking should be prohibited. Firstly, Cigarettes contain harmful substances like nicotine that reaches the brain and make people addictive and hard to quit these leads to damage people's health. Long term smokers are more likely to suffer from diseases such as cancer, heart diseases and respiratory problems. In addition passive smoking can affect non-smokers, particularly kids and elder people. For Instance, children at home may develop breathing difficulties, therefore banning smoking could protect both smokers and wider community.

Another reason is that making cigarette smoking illegal could discourage young people from developing harmful habits. The youth is getting addicted to the cigars due to heavy work pressure and also out of curiosity. For example In India the most of the software engineers are puffing for stress relief and some people getting addictive for entertainment purpose thinking it maintains social status and stepping paths in wrong direction. Government should take strict actions on people smoking publicly. They should make campaigns and educational awareness all over the cities villages and everywhere.

However, a complete ban could create some difficulties, People who are already addicted may find difficult to stop smoking immediately so the government should start free counselling sessions and campaining awareness among people.

In conclusion I agree to the point smoking sho be banned and make illegal to people

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed the prompt by stating a clear position in favor of banning smoking. You provide relevant reasons, such as health risks and the impact on passive smokers, and you acknowledge the counter-argument regarding the difficulty of quitting. However, the development of your ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the example regarding software engineers in India is a bit anecdotal and lacks a clear connection to the broader argument about legislation. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed argument that directly supports your thesis, rather than listing multiple points that are not fully explored.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'In addition', and 'In conclusion'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the transition 'For Instance' which is capitalized mid-sentence. Additionally, some sentences are run-on or lack proper punctuation, which disrupts the flow. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that your sentences are clearly separated by appropriate punctuation to enhance the overall progression of your ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to discuss the topic, using terms like 'respiratory problems', 'passive smoking', and 'counselling sessions'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'puffing for stress relief' and 'stepping paths in wrong direction'. You also repeat the word 'addictive' or 'addicted' multiple times. To improve, try to use more precise synonyms and collocations. For example, instead of 'make people addictive', use 'create dependency'. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic or formal expressions will help you achieve a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'these leads to damage'), missing articles (e.g., 'the most of the software engineers'), and punctuation errors, such as comma splices in the introduction and conclusion. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the clarity of your writing. Focus on proofreading your work to correct basic errors in tense and sentence structure, and practice using complex sentences with more accurate subordinating conjunctions.

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