Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Smoking is one of the leading cause of lung disease, essential steps must be taken to stop it. I totally agree with this statement. This essay will explain that smoking is injurious to health and should be made illegal and how I agree.

First of all, smoking is one of the major causes of lung cancer, so it is essential to take steps to stop sale and purchase of cigarettes. Access of local people to cigars should be made difficult. In this way, smoking rate can be decreased and so the cases of lung diseases. For example, government should put ban on the local stores to sale such products.

Furthermore, smoking causes tuberculosis, a serious lung disease. It is contagious disease, as it spread from one infected individual to others while coughing. Its mortality rate is also very high especially in underdeveloped countries, like ours. Although, hospitals and staff try their best to treat such patients but its better to prevent than cure. Therefore, all the essential measures should be taken by the ruling authorities to make smoking illegal and decreases the rate of such serious diseases.

In conclusion, I firmly believe that smoking can cause serious illness and should be made illegal because it is one of the leading causes of increased mortality rate due to lung illness. Therefore, necessary steps should be taken to stop it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position, but the development is limited. While you identify that smoking causes lung disease, the arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. Crucially, the essay is under the 250-word minimum, which significantly impacts the development of ideas and results in a penalty. To improve, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations or additional examples. For instance, instead of just stating that smoking causes tuberculosis, you could discuss the broader socio-economic impact or the effectiveness of alternative measures like public awareness campaigns versus outright prohibition.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' to signal transitions. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical, and the links between sentences could be more sophisticated. To reach a higher band, try to vary your linking words and ensure that the relationship between sentences is more fluid. For example, instead of starting every paragraph with a simple transition, try integrating cohesive devices within the sentences to improve the flow of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for a higher score. You use some relevant terms like 'mortality rate' and 'contagious', but there are also instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'put ban on the local stores to sale'. The word choice is often repetitive, relying on basic descriptors. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and academic vocabulary. Expanding your range of synonyms and learning how to use them in context will help you express your ideas with greater clarity and sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('smoking is one of the leading cause') and incorrect verb forms ('to sale' instead of 'to sell'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation and article errors that occur regularly. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the overall quality of the writing. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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