Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Smoking is widely recognized by the world. Smoking created a lot of cause of major health problems like, Sickness, Health problem, and Respiratory problem. If smoking should argue rather, it's legal that is defiantly a crime in eyes of law. That is legal in each and every country because they can destroy health of living being and the atmosphere too.

I don't agree to what extent because even a slightly smoking is injurious to health. So, don't try anywhere because it only destroys you and other people. Smoking is dangerous for everyone doesn't matter if it's living being or non-living being. There is only one way to stop that to strictly aware the health department and community development department that do job with honesty and politely. Because if they can't do their job properly that would destroy the health and environment too.

I have only one answer for that you can't promote the smoking because it would only harm to anyone and it would never benefit to anyone. Because they make that thing only to destroy health and environment. So, they can shine their markets in the world and earn money from that disaster level threat that cause deaths, sickness, heart, and respiratory.

In conclusion, although smoking is serious threat to world. The government should stop that unless it's too late. Government should impose a high duty tax to that item So, the mafia and the bad buyers do not buy that. That is only the way to stop these smoking habits of people and save them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the task minimally, presenting a position that smoking should be illegal because it causes serious illnesses. However, the ideas are limited and under-developed, with repetitive assertions rather than deep, well-supported arguments. For instance, the writer repeatedly states that smoking destroys health and the environment without explaining the mechanisms or providing specific examples of how this occurs. The perspective on whether the writer agrees is somewhat unclear and shifts around phrases like "I don't agree to what extent." To move to a higher band, the writer needs to present a clearer, more sustained position and extend their main ideas with distinct supporting points and relevant examples, ensuring all parts of the prompt are fully explored.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently throughout the text. While the essay is broken into paragraphs, the overall progression lacks a logical flow, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are often abrupt or missing, such as the sudden pivot in the second paragraph with "I don't agree to what extent because even a slightly smoking is injurious to health." Cohesive devices are used inadequately and sometimes confusingly, leading to a disjointed structure. To achieve a higher band, the writer must establish a clear logical organization with proper paragraph grouping and use cohesive devices more accurately and naturally to guide the reader smoothly from one point to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, utilizing a limited range of words to express ideas, such as repeatedly using "destroy," "health," and "smoking." There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations that cause difficulty and strain for the reader, including phrases like "slightly smoking," "living being or non-living being," "strictly aware the health department," and "disaster level threat." Word form and spelling issues are also present. To improve this criterion, the writer needs to expand their lexical range by incorporating less common vocabulary, focusing on correct word choices, and mastering natural collocations related to health and government policy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing demonstrates a very limited range of structures, with frequent errors that often distort meaning and impede communication. Sentence patterns are frequently faulty or incomplete, such as in "If smoking should argue rather, it's legal that is defiantly a crime in eyes of law" and "There is only one way to stop that to strictly aware the health department." There are persistent issues with verb forms, missing articles, prepositions, and basic sentence construction. To move to a higher band, the writer must develop better control over basic grammatical structures, reduce the frequency of errors, and attempt a wider mix of accurate simple and complex sentence forms.

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