Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

smoking is injurious to our life.it cause many disease that is harmful to our lungs.lungs is the important organ of our body .it help to inhale and exhale breath.if your lungs is not healthy that's not good for our health because of smoking. after that we not despite this bad habits so its become more and more Loss to our health . smoking not only harm those person who smoked it also loss the person who breath in their environment.smoking material should ban on shop and government should take action on those who sell and buy .i iell you that i personally experience that my mother , cousin has also this disease so it affects his lungs.so reason become lungs cancer.i only one request to government please take legal action and safe our country this smoking .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt partially by discussing whether smoking should be made illegal and noting the dangers of passive smoking. However, the ideas are quite limited and under-developed, relying on basic assertions such as 'smoking is injurious to our life' and brief personal mentions without adequate expansion. Furthermore, there is a significant penalty regarding length, as the task requires a minimum of 250 words, but this response contains only 137 words, falling well short of the requirement. To move to a higher band, the writer must ensure the word count requirement is met and develop each main idea with more detailed reasoning and supportive examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response shows some organization in presenting basic points about health risks and a call for government action, but there is no clear overall progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are generally absent or inaccurate, and the text lacks logical transitions between sentences and ideas. For instance, phrases like 'after that we not despite this bad habits' create confusion rather than guiding the reader smoothly. There is also a complete lack of paragraphing, with the entire text presented as a single block. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to group ideas into logical paragraphs and use a wider range of appropriate cohesive devices to connect sentences smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for expressing basic concepts about smoking and health, such as 'harmful,' 'lungs,' and 'disease.' There are noticeable lexical errors, including word choice and collocation issues like 'loss the person who breath' instead of 'harm the person who breathes,' and spelling errors like 'iell' instead of 'tell.' These errors can cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve lexical resource, the writer should incorporate a wider variety of less common vocabulary items with greater precision in word formation and collocation, while checking spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writer uses a very limited range of sentence structures, mostly relying on simple sentences with frequent errors in basic grammar and punctuation. There are repeated issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'it cause many disease' instead of 'it causes many diseases' and 'lungs is the important organ' instead of 'the lungs are important organs.' Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic throughout the text, as seen in 'smoking is injurious to our life.it cause...'. To reach a higher band, the writer must produce a better mix of complex sentence forms and improve control over basic grammar rules, tense consistency, and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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