Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Smoking is a not good for health as it can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal. I agree with this statement because it cause breathing problems as well as cancer. It should be unavailable legally in the country which help to reduce smokers.

On the one hand, smoking can cause serious illnesses as the majority of people use smoking which put adverse impact not only on respiratory system but also can cause cardiovascular diseases. The survey which is conducted by WHO, it stated that more than 5000 deaths are caused due to smoking. In mnay parts of the world, people are visting doctors who face difficulty in breathing as well as some patients are affected by cancer. The most of people's lungs are affected due to toxic substance which they inhale through smoking and it is directly linked to lungs.

However, the smoking is unavailable legally as the most of teenagers do not have enough knowledge about whether this is good or bad thing for their health. They think that this is good thing for thier health because other people consume this and try to it in their real life. If smoking is unavailable legally teenagers are difficult to find and never try this in their life. Additionally, it is responsibility they put stricker penalities to the factories which are making these types of product.

In conclusion, smoking is very bad as it can cause serious illnesses like cancer as well as death problems as well as it should be illegal aspeople are difficult to find it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a clear position in the introduction, agreeing that smoking should be illegal, and you give relevant reasons: serious illness and the influence of smoking on teenagers. The discussion of respiratory and cardiovascular harm, cancer, and the WHO survey also shows an attempt to support your view with examples. However, the argument is only partly developed. The survey figure is not explained or connected clearly to the case for prohibition, and the claim that teenagers would “never try this” if smoking were illegal is asserted rather than supported. The conclusion repeats the position but does not draw together the reasons. Develop the evidence and explain why a legal ban would be effective, while addressing the implications of making smoking illegal more fully. (The required length is met.)

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “On the one hand” and “However,” and a conclusion. This gives the reader a basic route through your ideas. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and some links are unclear or mechanical. For example, the first body paragraph moves from general health effects to a survey and then to patients’ symptoms without clearly showing how each point supports the argument for a ban. In the second paragraph, “However” suggests a contrast, but the paragraph continues to support prohibition. The final sentence is difficult to follow. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, use linking expressions that reflect the actual relationship between ideas, and make references such as “this” explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “respiratory system,” “cardiovascular diseases,” “toxic substance,” and “penalties,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate enough to make parts of the argument difficult to understand. Examples include “death problems,” “unavailable legally,” and “try to it in their real life.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “mnay,” “visting,” “thier,” and “stricker.” Aim for precise, natural phrases and check spelling carefully. For instance, describe smoking as “banned by law” and refer to “smoking-related deaths”; this will make your meaning clearer and more appropriate for an academic argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “as” and “which,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, the range is limited, and complex structures are often faulty. In “it cause breathing problems,” the verb does not agree with its subject; “the survey which is conducted by WHO, it stated” combines clauses incorrectly; and “If smoking is unavailable legally teenagers are difficult to find” has an unclear and incomplete grammatical structure. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “a not good for health” and the long final sentence. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses, and use punctuation to separate complete ideas.

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