Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Smoking is possibly the cause of serious illnesses and should not be legal.

People are free to make their own decisions, what do not mean that they make the best choices for themselves. That is why sometimes the government have to intervene and set rules to decide what is legal or not. This essay agrees that smoking should be ilegal.

Some prople believe that they should be free to make their own decisions even if it is harmful for their health. They can enjoy their free will and later face the consequences of their choices. To smoke can seem to be an individual decision, but it is not. In long-term, tobacco usage affects public health because when the health issues start coming, people will have to treat their ilnesses and will use public resources.

Smoking can cause problems to people's health, but anyway people keep doing this.

It is widely known that smoking increase the chances of cancer, for example. Ten years of smoking can increase in 30 times the chance of developing a cancer, if the person already has a predisposition to this illness, the number is even higher.

Besides serious ilnesses, there is another point to be considered when we talk about smokers: their bad smell. It bothers people around, mainly kids that must not be exposed to this kind of substance at early ages.

In conclusion, I agree that government should make smoking ilegal, because it is a prevention measure and would make people's life safer as well.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the opening and conclusion: you agree that smoking should be illegal. You address the central issue with relevant reasons, including the burden on public healthcare and the effects of smoke on children, and you give cancer as an example. This fits the task well. However, some points are less fully developed than others. The claim that smoking increases cancer risk “in 30 times” is specific but unsupported and would be more convincing with a reliable qualification or explanation. The point about smokers’ “bad smell” is also less persuasive as a reason for prohibition than the health arguments. Explain how your examples support making smoking illegal, and consider the counterargument about personal freedom more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, paragraphs presenting reasons, and a conclusion that restates your view. Ideas generally follow a sensible order, and linking phrases such as “That is why,” “Besides,” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. However, progression within the body is sometimes uneven. The paragraph beginning “Smoking can cause problems” repeats the general health point before moving to cancer and then smell, so its focus is not fully controlled. Some connections are also unclear, particularly the shift from individual choice to public resources. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main reason, then develop that reason in a clear sequence. More precise referencing and less reliance on formulaic transitions would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main argument, including relevant terms such as “public resources,” “predisposition,” and “exposed.” There are also attempts to express abstract ideas about personal choice and government intervention. However, word choice and spelling are not consistently controlled, and some phrases sound unnatural or imprecise, such as “when the health issues start coming” and “increase in 30 times the chance.” Errors including “ilegal,” “prople,” and “ilnesses” are noticeable. “Bad smell” is understandable but informal for an academic argument. Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling carefully; this would make your ideas sound more fluent and appropriately formal without changing their meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mixture of simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if the person already has a predisposition” and a relative clause in “people around, mainly kids that must not be exposed.” Most of the meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors occur. For example, “what do not mean” should be “which does not mean,” and “the government have to intervene” needs subject–verb agreement. The sentence beginning “Ten years of smoking” becomes difficult to follow because it joins a claim about increased risk with a conditional clause using commas rather than clear sentence boundaries. Review agreement, clause construction, and punctuation, and practise combining ideas into accurate complex sentences. These improvements would help you express the argument more smoothly.

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