Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

People are widely addicted to smoking products and it can cause serious health problems, such as lung cancer, heart disease and mental illness. While, the government should take strict measures against the use of smoking products. I completely agree with making these products illegal and improving people's health.

To begin with, smoking products have a high level of tobacco and nicotine, which makes people addicted to consuming cigarettes. Firstly, it mainly causes heart risks. These products invite serious diseases such as heart attack and lung cancer. It not only affects the health who consume it but it also affects the people around them. Smoking has a direct connection with mental stability. People consuming it for reduce their frustration but later on it turns into a habit, and it increases the level of anxiety and depression. For example, People consume cigarettes and vapes to get relief from tension and stress, but it increases their use of them and invites health risks.

Furthermore, the government should take strict measures to reduce the use of them. The government provide education to young people and prevents smoking products. They should conduct a campaign to raise awareness among people about the consequences of smoking. Moreover, they should apply a high tax on nicotine products and charge a high penalty on people, who seem to consume it in public places. It creates a burden on the health system. For example, people who are affected by tobacco products need special treatments and need high-cost equipment. As a result, it affects the country's economy and people who come from the middle class, have to suffer financial problems to cure such diseases.

In conclusion, Smoking can cause serious health problems. However, it can be reduced only by government actions and rules; apart from that it provides happiness and peace to people after quitting such habits.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you completely agree that smoking products should be illegal, and the conclusion returns to the health risks and the need for government action. You address both the harms of smoking and possible responses, including education, campaigns, taxation and penalties. The health effects on smokers and people nearby are relevant, and the example of treatment costs adds support. This meets the task well, with some elements showing the fuller development expected at the next level. However, the case for making smoking illegal is not fully distinguished from reducing or regulating its use: high taxes and public-place penalties do not themselves establish why a complete ban is necessary. The claim that smoking causes mental illness also needs more careful explanation or evidence, and the final point about happiness and peace is unclear and weakens the conclusion’s position. Develop these points more precisely and consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs with different focuses, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages, and the examples generally appear beside the points they support. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical because several sentences begin with “The government” or “These products,” and the reference in “reduce the use of them” is awkward and not fully clear. The first body paragraph also moves from physical illness to mental health without a clear transition, while the final sentence introduces an idea that does not connect logically to the conclusion. Use more precise referencing and link each example explicitly to the paragraph’s main claim to make progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “nicotine,” “heart disease,” “awareness,” “penalty,” and “health system,” so the main ideas are understandable. There are also attempts at more formal expressions, such as “raise awareness” and “financial problems.” However, several word choices and collocations are unnatural or imprecise: “smoking products,” “heart risks,” “invite serious diseases,” and “high-cost equipment” do not express the intended meanings naturally. Repetition of “products,” “people,” and “government” also limits flexibility. Some phrases, including “mental stability” and “provides happiness and peace,” are vague in this context. Build a more precise set of collocations for health effects, addiction and policy, and check whether each chosen phrase accurately conveys your point.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex forms, including a relative clause in “people, who seem to consume it in public places” and a contrast introduced by “While.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “While, the government should…” is an incomplete subordinate clause, “The government provide” has subject–verb disagreement, and “People consuming it for reduce their frustration” has faulty verb forms. There are also problems with articles and sentence construction in “it not only affects the health who consume it.” Review clause formation, agreement, and verb patterns, and proofread punctuation around introductory clauses. More consistently accurate complex sentences would strengthen the response.

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