Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Smoking is injurious to health. Many people believe that smoking should be banned because it causes lethal diseases. In my perspective, although smoking causes serious health issues, by making them illegal can create black markets.Thus, I partially agree with this view point. I will elaborate my reasons along with examples in the following paragraphs.

The most concerning reason why smoking should be made illegal is that it can cause swere health problems.For example, if individuals consume cigarettes regularly, their kidneys may be badly damages which might cause kidney failure or cancer. Therefore, if the government makes smoking illegal, people's health might be protected since they cannot get cigarettes or vapes from the stores. Hence, it is a positive development.

However, others think that if the authorities ban smoking, it might encourage the black market. Smokers cannot leave the habit of smoking once they are addicted to it. For example, in many countries, people cannot sell and buy prohibited products such as vaping, tobacco etc., but people still get from such markets. Even these products are more expensive as compared to regular cigarettes prices. As a result, this not only puts pressure on their monthly budgets but also affects their health. Thus, making smoking illegal is not an effective solution to encourage people to quit it.

In conclusion, the government can pause to sell cigarettes to protect the health of the nation. However, people can still buy them illegally from the back market. In my opinion, the authorities should bring alternatives to encourage people to quit smoking by themselves such as by education them about the negative effects of smoking.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you partially agree, recognising the health risks while arguing that prohibition could create black markets. You address both sides and give relevant examples, including the possible effects of regular smoking and the continued sale of prohibited products. This meets the task well, but the ideas are not equally developed. The claim that cigarettes may damage the kidneys is specific, yet it would be stronger with a clearer explanation or a more directly supported example. Likewise, the conclusion proposes education as an alternative, but this solution is introduced briefly rather than developed. To strengthen the response further, explain how your examples support your position and clarify what measures, beyond education, could reduce smoking.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your position, two body paragraphs present contrasting arguments, and a conclusion restates your view. Linking expressions such as “However,” “For example,” and “As a result” help readers follow the progression. This is a coherent arrangement, although some connections feel mechanical or unclear. In the first body paragraph, “Therefore” and “Hence” repeat the same cause-and-effect movement, while “Even these products” does not clearly identify which products or connect smoothly to the previous point. The conclusion also shifts from the black-market concern to education without fully bridging the ideas. Use fewer repeated linkers and make references explicit so each sentence follows naturally from the one before it.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “lethal diseases,” “black markets,” “prohibited products,” and “negative effects.” These choices communicate the main ideas, and you attempt some less common expressions. However, several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision: “swere health problems” appears to mean “severe health problems,” “back market” should be “black market,” and “pause to sell cigarettes” does not express the intended idea naturally. “Kidneys may be badly damages” also contains an incorrect word form. Aim for accurate, natural combinations rather than more elaborate wording—for example, “impose a ban,” “illicit trade,” and “raise awareness.” Proofreading spelling and checking collocations would make your vocabulary more controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in “although smoking causes serious health issues” and conditional structures such as “if individuals consume cigarettes regularly.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some grammatical errors affect accuracy. For example, “by making them illegal can create black markets” lacks a clear grammatical subject; “their kidneys may be badly damages” has an incorrect verb form; and “by education them” uses the wrong form after “by.” There are also punctuation and spacing issues, such as the missing space after “markets.” and “problems.For.” To improve, check subject–verb structure, verb forms after prepositions, and sentence boundaries, while continuing to use varied sentence patterns.

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