Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-07-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Nowadays, there is need of keeping animals in the zoos, it should rather be closed. I strongly disagree because zoos have served as a tourist attraction point for many decades and it generate revenue for the government.
On the one hand, although some zoologists are protesting against keeping animals in a restricted area like the zoos, it is important we look at the value and impact it is having on people live. For instance, it has served as a sightseeing location for many decades and people love to visit zoos with their families and loved ones. This is important because some of these animals can't be seen frequently unless in the wild, which is not convenient for most people to do.
On the other hand, zoos have been a major source of revenue for some countries, it has been a place where a lot of tourists pay to see these animals. For example, Saudi Arabia makes millions of dollars from the sales of ticket in their Aramco Zoo in Riyadh which has a collection of 90% world animals. The resources made from the ticketing is then used to develop the transport and public schools in the country. It has basically served as a strong source of revenue for the government.
In conclusion, although some zoologists and animal protectionist have raised global concerns about keeping animals in the zoos, I strongly believe that is its tourist attraction and the revenue it generates for some countries is a good reason to continue having them.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention tourism and revenue, the arguments could be more thoroughly explored by discussing the educational or conservation roles of zoos, which are standard counter-arguments. The example regarding the Aramco Zoo is specific, but the claim that it holds '90% of world animals' is factually questionable and weakens the credibility of your argument. To reach a higher band, ensure your supporting examples are realistic and provide more depth to your reasoning rather than repeating the same points about revenue in different ways.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two main arguments. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing (e.g., 'it' referring to 'zoos') is always clear will help improve the overall flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'tourist attraction', 'restricted area', and 'global concerns'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'tourist attraction point' (redundant) and 'people live' (should be 'people's lives'). The phrase '90% world animals' is also awkward. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing. While you attempt to use some less common vocabulary, the overall range remains somewhat limited, which prevents a higher score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('it generate revenue' instead of 'it generates') and article usage errors ('the zoos' when referring to zoos in general). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some run-on sentences and comma splices, such as in the second paragraph: '...for some countries, it has been a place...'. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher band score. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and sentence boundaries.
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