Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Zoos have become unnecessary for housing animals should therefor be closed . I truely agreed with this statement . I am going to give my opinion in my upcoming paragraphs .
To begin with, why i am in the faviour of this because the zoos are one kind of presion for the animals they cannot move freely in their surroundings . they need to live their lives freely which they are not able to do however lead to loneliness and behaviour change make them more dangerous . In addition ,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under the required word count of 250 words, reaching only 90 words. Consequently, the task is not fully addressed, and the development of ideas is severely limited. While you state your position clearly in the introduction, the essay stops abruptly before providing any substantial arguments or supporting examples. To improve, you must expand your response by providing at least two well-developed body paragraphs that explore the reasons for your opinion with specific examples, as required by the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay lacks a clear structure due to its incomplete nature. While there is an attempt to use a cohesive device ('To begin with'), the text ends mid-sentence, preventing any logical progression of ideas. Paragraphing is present but ineffective because the content is too sparse to establish a coherent argument. To improve, ensure you have a clear introduction, at least two body paragraphs with distinct main ideas, and a concluding paragraph. Use a wider variety of linking words such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'in contrast' to connect your ideas smoothly.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, such as the use of 'freely' twice in one sentence. There are also spelling errors like 'therefor' (therefore), 'truely' (truly), and 'faviour' (favour). The word 'presion' is likely a misspelling of 'prison', which indicates a limited control over word choice and spelling. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a broader range of topic-specific vocabulary related to animal welfare and conservation, and pay closer attention to accurate spelling and word formation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The writing contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'Zoos have become unnecessary for housing animals should therefor be closed' (missing subject/conjunction), 'why i am in the faviour' (incorrect word order), and 'make them more dangerous' (fragmented sentence structure). There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and punctuation is inconsistent, particularly with spacing around commas. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practice using complex sentences with subordinating conjunctions like 'although' or 'because'.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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