Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

As we all know nowadays most of the animals are almost extinct. Although keeping them in zoos is like an imprisonment, In my perspective it is the only place where they can stay safe and live longer. In the following pragraphs I will explain why I deny this fact.

To commence with, most of the animals are living in forests and they always lives in fear of to be hunt and some of them die because of accidents on roads. However, if we have the zoos in some urban area or near to the forests, these animals can be protected as they can be keep in zoos. For instance, deers and grizzly bears which lives in open areas, last year in Alberta, Canada, two grizzly bears were died in road accident during night time, because they were crossing the road and by mistake a big trailer hit both the bears, so they died on time. Therefore keeping these animals in zoos is beneficial for them on behalf of saving them from accidents.

Furthermore, there are vast number of wild animals which are near about to extinct. Therefore zoos are the only way to preserve these animals and save their lives. Moreover, most of these creature are extinct because of hunger. To clarify, sometimes animals do not get enough food to eat, so they just eat whatever they find, which occur many diseases and harm their health. Consequently, zoos provide enough food to all these creatures which helps them to stay alive longer.

In my opinion, zoos should not be closed as it is the only way to preserve the creatues.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout, arguing against the closure of zoos. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide an example regarding grizzly bears, the argument relies heavily on the idea of road accidents, which is a specific issue rather than a comprehensive defense of zoos. The second body paragraph touches on extinction and hunger, but these points are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the educational or scientific roles of zoos, providing a more balanced and nuanced discussion of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'Consequently' to link your thoughts. However, some of these transitions feel a bit mechanical or forced. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'these creatures' which is used broadly. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the internal flow within paragraphs could be improved by varying the sentence structures and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one without relying on repetitive phrasing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'big', 'stay alive', and 'save their lives'. There are also some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'deny this fact' (which is confusing in this context) and 'on behalf of saving them'. To improve, you should aim to use more precise collocations and less common vocabulary related to conservation and animal welfare. The spelling is generally accurate, but the range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. You have frequent grammatical errors, such as 'most of the animals are almost extinct' (should be 'many'), 'lives in fear of to be hunt' (should be 'living in fear of being hunted'), and 'two grizzly bears were died' (should be 'died'). Subject-verb agreement issues are also present, such as 'most of these creature are'. These errors occur frequently and occasionally distract the reader, although they do not fully impede communication. Focusing on basic sentence construction and verb forms will help improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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