Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Animals should not be captivated in zoos. Therefore, there is no need to keep zoos open. Although some people would agree with the given statement, I completely disagree with it which will be discussed in the following paragraphs.

To begin with, people supporting the given statement argue that keeping animals closed inside cages is against their rights to privacy. In other words, having them kept in zoos to entertain audience is an act of violating their rights to live freely. However, they animals are provided with appropriate care regularly to ensure their safety and well being. This means, their fundamental needs, such as healthy food, drink and medical treatment in case of injuries, are taken care of by professionals. To give an example, one of the biggest zoos in India called "Vantara" is designed to keep a number of species, that need special treatments, safe from potential threats from other wild animals. Hence, zoos should be kept open for betterment of wild species.

Furthermore, shutting down zoos permanently can have severe consequences on overall economy of the nation. This is because these zoos play a crucial role in generating a huge revenue by by selling a lot of tickets especially during holidays and vacation. Therefore, ban on such places can have detrimental impacts on nation's economy. Moreover, a complete shut down of zoos can also result in sudden mass unemployment since a zoo usually includes a lot of workers whose profession would be at high risks. Hence, closing zoos should be avoided at all cost by the government because of its benefits.

In conclusion, keeping animals forcefully in the cage is against their will. However, zoos can not only keep species safe from danger by ensuring the fulfillment of their basic requirements but also contribute economic growth by generating wealth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have clearly addressed the prompt by taking a firm position against closing zoos. Your arguments regarding animal welfare and economic benefits are relevant and well-structured. You have provided a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are fully extended. For instance, while you mention economic benefits, you could provide more specific detail on how zoos contribute to conservation or education, which are common counter-arguments. The ideas are relevant, but some points, such as the 'mass unemployment' claim, could be supported with more nuanced reasoning to avoid over-generalisation.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

Your essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. You use a variety of cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', 'In other words', and 'Hence' to link your points effectively. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct theme. However, there are minor issues with referencing and flow; for example, the phrase 'they animals' in the second paragraph is a grammatical slip that disrupts the cohesion. Overall, the logical flow is easy to follow, and the structure supports the development of your argument well.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas clearly. You use some less common items such as 'detrimental impacts', 'fundamental needs', and 'potential threats'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'captivated' (which means charmed, rather than 'kept in captivity') and 'closed inside cages' (which is slightly unnatural). Additionally, the repetition of 'given statement' is a bit mechanical. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing to demonstrate a more sophisticated control of language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures throughout the essay. While your meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that persist, such as 'they animals are provided', 'by by selling', and 'at all cost' (should be 'costs'). You also have some issues with article usage and pluralization. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent article usage, and try to incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence forms with greater accuracy.

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