Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

One of the pressing issues widely discussed is that, in contemporary times, captivating animals in zoos is no longer a necessity required to fulfil in the society. Consequently, it is said that shutting down of zoos would be a pivotal decision made by the government. In this essay, as per my understanding I completely support this decision for the welfare of the animals especially the endangered species.

To commence with, although, it is essential to have such recreational spaces which helps students to generate awareness and enhance their knowledge about existing ecosystem which they generally tend to study in their schools. Furthermore, families can plan one day trip to such places to rejuvenate and relax after spending quality time together which can be beneficial in terms of broadening horizons of kids, expanding learnings simultaneously by breaking the monotony of daily routine.

However, animals are been brought to zoos for the purpose of fun and entertainment and to generate revenue in the country, regardless of their maintenance and their well-being. Their diet, health, medication are not been catered well by the zookeepers and the government. Therefore, it is essential to allow autonomy to such creatures to live with freedom and prosperity by leaving them in their homeland, considerably forests. Otherwise, Government has to particularly designed and regulate such norms for such species for their preservation and saving them from the urge of extinction. For instance, Vantara is one of the prominent examples, a venture initiated by the Anant Ambani who has specially built rehabilitation centre to take care of the animals and to protect them.

To recapitulate, despite the fact of educational advantages for people, it is crucial to harbour the needs of unspoken creatures for the balance of ecosystem and to maintain equilibrium in the world. As Zoos are tend to be confined version of living lifestyle whereas after declination of ratio of animals there are much more prospects which requires utmost attention from government and public.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the task, stating a clear opinion against keeping animals in zoos and supporting the closure of zoos for animal welfare. However, it lacks strong examples directly discussing the benefits of shutting down zoos, which would better illustrate its main argument. The essay does introduce the significance of recreational spaces for education, but this is not adequately balanced against the drawbacks of zoos. Overall, the response is only partially fulfilling the task requirements, leading to a score of around 6.5 for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a reasonable structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, coherence is hampered by some awkward phrasing and transitions, such as 'shutting down of zoos' which could be better constructed as 'the shutdown of zoos'. Sentence structures can also feel convoluted, making it harder for readers to follow the argument. More cohesive devices and clearer connections between ideas are needed to enhance flow and coherence, resulting in a coherence band score of 6.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The writer uses suitable vocabulary but occasionally misuses terms such as "harbour the needs of unspoken creatures" where a more straightforward phrase could be employed. While some expressions like "generating awareness" and "expand learnings" are adequate, they lack sophistication. The use of less common vocabulary or phrases could elevate the writing. Thus, the lexical resource band score reflects this at about 6.5 due to the repetitive choice of words.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

Grammatical accuracy shows noticeable weaknesses, with errors like "animals are been brought" instead of "animals are brought" and awkward constructions like "it is essential to allow autonomy to such creatures." These mistakes occasionally distract from the overall argument. The writer also uses a mix of simple and complex sentences, but consistency in grammar and structure could be improved. This results in a grammatical range and accuracy score of 6.

Overall feedback

Overall, the essay presents a clear stance on an important issue and attempts to support it with relevant arguments. However, it would benefit from stronger examples and clearer connections between points. Work on improving the flow of ideas and coherence throughout your paragraphs. Additionally, enhancing your vocabulary choice will help articulate your arguments more effectively. Focus on varying sentence structures to improve grammatical accuracy, which will strengthen your overall writing.

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