Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, keeping animals in zoo is a controversial issues. Therefore, a group of people thinks that there is not strong benefits of having animals in the zoo, so this shelter should be shutdown. I am strongly agree with the given statement and further reasons with examples are discuss in the following paragraphs.

The primary reason to close the animal park is this create a barrier for them to live freely. This is because, wild life sanctuary has a limited space for the animals to survive. However, in the forest they have free life to roam and live with the real nature, where they can express themselves. For instance, in Canada, wild animals have been kept in the small cages in which they get limited amount of space to live.

Furthermore, their body will loose their internal strength while staying at identical place for more than few years. If they are living in the forest, they will get better animal life and have opportunities to go for hunt by themselves. Whereas in the concrete zoo they need to survive under one roof.

In contrast, having safari park would be more beneficial for the animals who are at the line of extinction, because zoo keeper would highly take care of their medication and diet under supervision of experts. For example, in India, Vantara offers every required services to their animals on time to protect them.

In conclusion, although animal conservation park would be better place for those who are near the extinction of wildlife, open jungle would offers more benefits to the wild animals to live their life freely.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the arguments against zoos are clear, the counter-argument regarding conservation is introduced in the final body paragraph but is not fully integrated into the overall stance, leading to a slight contradiction in the conclusion. The ideas are relevant, but some points, such as the claim that animals lose 'internal strength' in zoos, lack scientific depth or clear explanation. To improve, ensure that each supporting point is fully elaborated with logical reasoning rather than just stating a claim.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Furthermore', 'In contrast', and 'In conclusion', which help the reader follow the flow of the argument. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are instances where the connection between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs is a bit abrupt. Referencing is generally clear, but the overall progression of ideas could be more sophisticated to achieve a higher band score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their opinion clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'extinction' and 'supervision', but there are also noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'there is not strong benefits' (should be 'there are no strong benefits') and 'loose their internal strength' (should be 'lose'). The range is sufficient to communicate the main points, but the lack of precision and occasional errors in word formation limit the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('this create a barrier', 'zoo keeper would highly take care'), article usage ('in the forest', 'in the zoo'), and pluralisation errors ('a group of people thinks'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the message, they are frequent enough to impact the overall fluency and accuracy of the writing. More attention to basic grammar rules and proofreading for small errors would significantly improve the score.

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