Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

There are two different examples with two point of view.

A zoo is a place of wonders.It has beautiful view for childern.colour ful animals of all kinds make kids comfortable and they enjoy alot.

In zoo animals are kept in cages to protect them from harsh environment.The management staff daily cleans the cages, maintain good hygene. And they feed animal properly at time , plenty of fresh clean water.Veterinary doctor are available for 24 hour services.

Public has full acess to visit zoo with in time limits.Zoo is also source of income for other people working as a guard, doctors , animal babysitter staff.public is charge a fare amount per head to visit a zoo.

In another secenario keeping zoo closed will effect the economy.Animal will be free.There will be no possibility that animals will be alive in this harsh environment.There will be no food or fresh water for them.

They will be rapidly targeted by predator.They will be hunted down by human hunter in hunting season.Freedom comes at a cost.Childern happiness wil be lost by keeping zoo close , inflation will occur with loss of jobs .

So the conclusion is i personaly neither agree or disagree with the statement that we donot need to keep animal in the zoo, So zoos should be closed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response sits at a lower band primarily because it fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 250 words, coming in at only 216 words. Regarding content, the task is addressed only minimally and tangentially. While the writer attempts to present a position in the final sentence by stating 'i personaly neither agree or disagree', the overall response lacks clear development. The ideas presented, such as zoo management, employment, and the harsh natural environment, are limited and remain under-developed, without sufficient supporting examples or thorough exploration of both sides of the argument. To improve, the writer must ensure the word count requirement is fully met and extend their ideas with clearer explanations and relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Information and ideas are not arranged in a truly coherent manner, reflecting a lack of clear overall progression. The writing is broken up into very short, disjointed paragraphs and single-sentence paragraphs, such as 'There are two different examples with two point of view.' Cohesive devices are minimal, repetitive, or inaccurate, and referencing is sometimes unclear, making the flow of the argument choppy and difficult to follow. For instance, transitional phrases between paragraphs are largely missing. To reach higher bands, the writer needs to group ideas logically into well-developed paragraphs, use a wider and more accurate range of cohesive devices to connect sentences smoothly, and establish a clear, progressive structure from introduction to conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, which is characteristic of this band. The student employs common words and phrases like 'place of wonders', 'beautiful view', and 'harsh environment', along with noticeable errors in word form, spelling, and word choice, such as 'childern', 'colour ful', 'hygene', 'acess', 'babysitter staff', and 'secenario'. These lexical inadequacies and spelling errors occasionally strain the reader, even though the general meaning remains understandable. To achieve a higher score, the writer must expand their lexical repertoire to include less common and more precise vocabulary, pay closer attention to spelling and word forms, and demonstrate greater accuracy in collocation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical range is very limited, relying heavily on simple sentence structures. Attempts at complex sentences or slightly more elaborate constructions are absent or faulty. There are frequent errors in basic grammar, including missing articles ('In zoo animals are kept', 'Veterinary doctor are available'), pluralisation and agreement issues ('Public is charge a fare amount'), and punctuation errors. These frequent errors distract the reader and disrupt the flow of reading, though they do not completely distort the overall meaning. To progress, the writer needs to incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence forms with good control over verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and articles.

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