Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS General Essentials · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

zoo is the place where all type of animals are placed for peoples enjoyment. we need animals in the zoo because we cant go to the forest to see such animals like : lion, tiger ,snake ,giraffe ,monkey ,birds , zebra or other wild animals. its suuch a wrong concept that we dont need zoo its the enjoyment place for adults but also useful for childrens to visit in the zoo to gain knpowledge or to see these animals and to love the nature. if there isnt any zoo so where we kept the animals for there safest place and to save their lives as well. we can kept all kind of animals in the zoo like who lives in the water who lives in the deserts or who flew in the skies or all kind of wild animals as well. zoo never get to closed because we can connect with the nature when we saw these animals. Animals have their own world life or nature to survive we can get knowlwgde about their life by seeing or getting in touch with them. zoo isnt the useless place to close its the place of enjoyment with families and childrens. school trips also go the zoo to make chilldren learn or to know about animals knowledge. its the good place to visit or to kept the animals as they live longer because , many animals and no longer with us like dinasoures and many other animals are ending day by day.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a clear position against closing zoos and give several relevant reasons: they let people see wild animals, provide educational visits for children, and may help protect animals. These points show an attempt to address the question and include examples such as school trips. However, the reasons are mostly asserted rather than explained. For instance, the claim that animals “live longer” in zoos is not supported, and the idea that zoos are needed to keep animals safe needs clarification about which animals and from what threats. The response also focuses heavily on enjoyment and repeats the same benefits. Develop fewer points with specific explanations or examples, and acknowledge the opposing concern about animal welfare before explaining your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The response stays broadly focused on zoos and presents a consistent opinion, but ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs or a logical progression. Nearly all points run together in one block, moving from enjoyment to education, animal safety, habitats, and extinction without clear links. Connectors such as “because” and “as well” appear, but they do not reliably show how one idea relates to the next; “if there isnt any zoo so where…” is especially difficult to follow. Repeated statements that zoos are enjoyable or useful also limit progression. Organise the essay into an introduction, separate body paragraphs for distinct reasons, and a conclusion, using clear topic sentences and references to avoid repetition.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “wild animals,” “school trips,” “nature,” and “survive,” so the main subject is usually identifiable. However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, particularly “animals,” “place,” and “enjoyment.” Some choices are unclear or unnatural, such as “all type of animals are placed,” “animals knowledge,” and “ending day by day.” Spelling errors, including “knpowledge,” “chilldren,” and “dinasoures,” also make the writing less clear. Build a more precise topic vocabulary and check spelling; for example, distinguish animal conservation from simply keeping animals in captivity, and use natural collocations such as “learn about wildlife” or “protect endangered species.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There are attempts to express reasons and conditions, including “because we cant go to the forest” and “if there isnt any zoo,” but sentence structures are mostly simple or joined into long, faulty sentences. Errors in articles, agreement, verb forms, and sentence boundaries occur throughout: “zoo is the place,” “all type of animals are placed,” and “we can kept” illustrate recurring problems. The sentence beginning “Animals have their own world life or nature to survive” is difficult to interpret partly because its grammatical relationships are unclear. Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, with many ideas separated only by commas. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine related ideas using controlled clauses and full stops.

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