Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

As some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Because they have already accepted there fate and they do not want to try more. So they just accept there fate. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.They believe in hard working. thery know how to overcome a sitution. They want to change there fate. They do not want to run from the situation. they fight for it ans achieve what they want. in my opinion the person who believe in himself and want to change his circumstances is right one. because God also help thpde who helpos themselves. the person who accepts his fate and live what he is embraced of. he would never achieve somethjing b9gger in life. he would never be remembered. like if he had a bad job or which gives him not that amount of money what he needs. and still he convinced himslef to stay in this condition he would never ever get out of this situation. on the other hand a person whoi want change his will work hard. if the job is frustrating oe does not give him enough money which he needs of. eitrher he will quite the job or he will start a side hustle which will give him passive income. and personally i also belive in hard work and i thinlk if a man made his mind snothin in the word dare to stop him.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both views and state a clear preference for trying to improve one’s circumstances: “the person who believe in himself and want to change his circumstances is right one.” You also give a relevant example involving an unsatisfactory job, either leaving it or starting a side hustle. However, the discussion is brief and the reasons are mostly asserted rather than explained; the view that people may accept hardship is reduced to “they have already accepted there fate,” without considering why acceptance might be sensible. Your opinion is present, but its support remains general. The response contains 221 words, so it is 29 words below the required minimum; the 33 words copied from the prompt are not counted. Develop both perspectives with specific reasoning and examples, and meet the minimum length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The response follows a basic sequence: it introduces acceptance, contrasts this with efforts to improve circumstances, and then gives your opinion and an example. Connectors such as “Others,” “in my opinion,” and “on the other hand” help signal these shifts. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and progression becomes difficult to follow in the long section beginning “the person who accepts his fate.” Several points repeat, including accepting one’s fate and working hard to change it, while sentence boundaries and transitions are often unclear. For example, “As some people believe…” is followed by a separate “Because” fragment. Use distinct paragraphs for the two views and your opinion, and connect each claim to its explanation with clear referencing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a small set of relevant expressions, including “unsatisfactory job,” “shortage of money,” “overcome a situation,” and “side hustle,” so the main topic is generally understandable. There are also attempts to express ideas beyond basic description, such as “change his circumstances” and “passive income.” However, vocabulary is limited and repetitive: “fate,” “situation,” and “work hard” recur without much variation. Several spelling errors, including “thery,” “somethjing,” and “belive,” make the writing less clear, and some phrases are awkward, such as “live what he is embraced of.” Build a more precise range for discussing financial hardship, job dissatisfaction, and practical responses, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both short statements and longer conditional or explanatory structures, for example, “if he had a bad job…” and “if the job is frustrating…”. However, sentence control is weak, and errors frequently affect clarity. The opening “As some people believe…” is a fragment, as is “Because they have already accepted…”. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “the person who believe” and “a person whoi want,” while tense and clause construction are also unreliable in “he would never achieve” and “if a man made his mind.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, with several sentences beginning in lowercase and run-on sequences. Practise forming complete sentences, checking agreement and verb forms, and separating clauses with appropriate punctuation.

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