Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years, the issue of unsatisfactory jobs or sortage of money has attracted considerable public and academic attention. While some people contend that unsatisfactory jobs has a positive impact on people health others maintain that this affect can them negatively. This essay will examine both perspectives before presenting my own view.

On the one hand, critics of unsatisfactory jobs frequently point out a number of significant drawback. A major reason for this is that people work for low salary jobs improve many health issue , resulting in stress as well as depression. For example recent research as shown that after many family problems they can,t work in satisify companies. Furthermore, its a difficult for future, which makes this approach less sustainable in the long run.

On the other hand, proponents of unsatisfactory jobs emphasize a number of notable benefits. This is primarly beacause young people work hard and improve this situations, which in turn leads to better impact on future generation. Consequently, best skills are always help for best jobs and salary. For instance, people learn skilles like aritificial intelligency its a helpful for good salary, clearly illustrating how unsatisfactory jobs and shortage of money better to try improve can positively influence both people and future generations.

In conclusion, after analyzing both sides of the unsatisfactory job or shortage of money, it can be concluded that the issue has both problems and solutions. Therefore a balanced approach a needed that acknowledge the risk while solution of unsatisfactory job and shortage of money, particularly when it is implemented in a responsible and well-regulated manner.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response attempts to discuss both views and gives a general preference for improving difficult circumstances, particularly through the reference to young people developing skills. However, it does not clearly explain the view that people should accept a bad situation, and much of the discussion focuses on whether unsatisfactory jobs affect health rather than comparing acceptance with efforts to improve. The examples, such as “recent research” and learning artificial intelligence skills, are vague and are not explained enough to support the claims. The conclusion calls for “a balanced approach” but does not clearly state which view you support or why. To strengthen the response, address both positions directly, develop a clear opinion, and use specific, relevant examples to explain your reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps readers identify the intended discussion. However, the progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because claims are not clearly connected or explained. For example, the first body paragraph moves from low-paid work to health problems, family problems, and future sustainability without showing how these points relate to accepting a situation. The second paragraph similarly shifts from working hard to skills, salaries, and future generations. Some linking phrases, including “Consequently” and “For instance,” are present, but they do not always clarify the relationship between ideas. Organise each paragraph around one view and develop its reasoning in a clearer sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt some topic-related and formal vocabulary, including “unsatisfactory,” “sustainable,” “proponents,” and “balanced approach.” These choices show an effort to discuss the issue beyond very basic language. However, the range is limited by repeated wording and frequent inaccurate word forms, spelling, and collocations, which sometimes make meaning unclear. Examples include “sortage,” “satisify companies,” “skilles,” and “best skills are always help for best jobs.” Phrases such as “better impact on future generation” and “low salary jobs” are also not expressed naturally. Aim to learn vocabulary in accurate combinations and check spelling and word forms. More precise language for acceptance, financial hardship, and taking steps to improve circumstances would help you express the task’s ideas clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response includes attempts at complex sentences, such as “While some people contend … others maintain …” and “which in turn leads to…,” as well as a range of simple statements. However, many sentences contain errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction, and these sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to understand. For example, “unsatisfactory jobs has” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “people work for low salary jobs improve many health issue” lacks a clear grammatical structure. The conclusion, “a balanced approach a needed,” also has a missing verb. Punctuation is inconsistent, including missing commas after introductory phrases. Practise building accurate basic clauses first, then connect them with subordinate clauses; carefully check agreement, articles, and complete verb phrases.

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