Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Certain people consider that the acceptance of a difficult circumstances is beneficial, for instance, lack of money or unrewarding employment. While others believe that trying for upgrading such situations is more better. This essay will examine both views, but from my perspective that making an effort to improve one's situation is the better approach.

On the one hand, one of the asspects that people often talk about the best way is to accept poorly paid employment in your life. They are worrying constantly about prolems that cannot be changed quickly. A person who earns a low salary, for example, may find greater peace of mind by learning to live within their means and appreciating what they already have. Moreover, a man who has a poorly paid job cannot afford his expenses he always finds troubles to fulfill his expenses and he never support his family members due to the lack of money. He makes less efforts to upgrade his position and to achieve his goals.

On the other hand, there are some people who deny this and believe that it is best way to improve your status and making an efforts for achieving your goals in your life. Such as, a person who always works hard to upgrade his job position and for his promotion he definitely fulfills his dreams. Improving one's position benefits others as well such as, a parent who who earns more can provide his children a education and healthcare, which breaks the cycle of disadvantages across generations.I believe that, the benefits of striving for improvenment are far greater.Taking evening courses while keeping a job is a safer path than abandoing work completely.

In conclusion, although accepting a difficult situation may reduce short-term stress, I am convinced that working to upgrade it leads to a more and fulfilling life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state a clear opinion: the introduction favours making an effort to improve one’s circumstances, and the conclusion returns to this position. The discussion of acceptance is relevant, especially the point that living within one’s means can bring peace of mind. The argument for change is also supported with examples about promotion and providing children with education and healthcare. However, the first view is not always explained consistently: the paragraph moves from the possible benefits of acceptance to the difficulties of low pay and then says the person makes little effort to improve. The second view would also benefit from a more specific example showing how someone’s efforts lead to change. Develop each side more evenly and clarify how each example supports the view being discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the discussion, and the opinion is easy to locate. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent overall arrangement and shows some stronger control through logical paragraphing. However, connections within paragraphs are less secure: the first body paragraph shifts from the benefits of acceptance to the hardships of low income without clearly explaining the relationship. Some linking phrases, including “Such as,” do not form a smooth transition into the example, and the final paragraph is compressed. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to its main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “peace of mind,” “low salary,” “promotion,” and “cycle of disadvantages.” There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “striving for improvement” and “short-term stress.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or awkward, which limits precision: “more better,” “upgrade his job position,” “fulfills his expenses,” and “a more and fulfilling life” do not sound natural. Spelling errors such as “asspects,” “prolems,” “improvenment,” and “abandoing” are noticeable. Build a reliable range of collocations for employment, finances, and personal progress, and proofread spelling and word forms so that your meaning is expressed more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “A person who earns a low salary…,” and you use subordination to express contrast and cause. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make sentences difficult to follow. For example, “the acceptance of a difficult circumstances” has an article and number mismatch, while “a person…cannot afford his expenses he always finds troubles” joins clauses without appropriate punctuation or a conjunction. Other examples include “a parent who who earns” and “provide his children a education.” Aim to control sentence boundaries, articles, agreement, and verb patterns. Shorter, accurately punctuated sentences would help you express the more complex ideas with greater clarity.

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