Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, smoking can results in serious health issues and the governoment should take actions aganist it and declear it illegal. I strongly agree with this statment because it can cause health problems such as cancer, and it also effects our mental state. It should be ban because it corrupts society.

On the one hand, smoking can effect our health, and could leads a person to cancer. As we know smoking tools contain toxic material such as tabacoo, which gradually has negative impact on our health. Due to extended somking these toxic materials weaken our our immune system which is responsible for to depend our body aganist diseases, as a result smoking effects a person lungs, or in some cases it mouth cancer. Furthermore, it aslo may have negative effects on a smoker menatal part. For example, if a person smokes he feels dizzy which is a fake sense of comfort. Then he gets addicted to it and he does not care about others, if he is unable to find it he acts anxiously.

On the other hand, governments should take measures aganist smoking and consider it illegal. Because it corrupts our society. For instance, if a person addicted to smoking and he do not have money buy smoking tools, he will act outrageous and in many case they choose the way of crime such as bulgury, snatching , and some time even to harm a person. So in order to protect society from such problems government should declear it as illegal.

To conclude, smoking is resposible for many health issues such as cancer and mental problems. However, it can also play a key role in corrupting society so therefore it should be banned.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you strongly agree that smoking should be illegal, and the conclusion restates this view. You address both health effects and the proposed legal response, with relevant examples such as cancer, addiction, and possible crime. This gives the response a sound basis. However, the two main arguments are not equally developed: the health discussion explains a possible process, while the claim that smokers may commit crimes is asserted broadly and needs more careful support. The task asks how far you agree, so explain why prohibition is preferable to measures such as restrictions or public-health campaigns, and qualify claims that are not universally true. This would make the reasoning more fully developed and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. The progression from health harms to social consequences is easy to follow, and examples generally appear alongside the relevant point. Some connections are mechanical or unclear, however. The sentence beginning “Because it corrupts our society” is a fragment, and “So in order to protect society” repeats the preceding claim rather than developing the link. The reference in “it mouth cancer” is also difficult to follow. Use complete sentences and make cause-and-effect links explicit; for example, distinguish evidence about health risks from your reasoning about whether criminalising smoking would address them.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “toxic material,” “immune system,” “addicted,” and “illegal,” which helps communicate the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make the writing less precise: “smoking tools,” “corrupts society,” and “mental part” are not natural expressions in this context, while “governoment,” “aganist,” and “declear” are misspelled. Repetition of “smoking,” “effects,” and “problems” also restricts variety. Build a more accurate set of topic phrases, such as “tobacco products,” “public health,” and “criminal activity,” and check spelling carefully. More precise wording would make your arguments clearer and more appropriately academic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures with “Due to” and “as a result,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in longer sentences. Examples include “smoking can results,” “could leads,” “he do not have money buy,” and “responsible for to depend,” where verb forms, agreement, or sentence patterns are faulty. There are also incomplete or awkward constructions, such as “Because it corrupts our society,” and the sentence about “it mouth cancer” lacks a clear grammatical structure. Practise checking each clause for a subject and correctly formed verb, and simplify sentences when needed. Accurate basic patterns will help your complex ideas read more clearly.

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