Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Smoking is a habit of inhaling tobacco that can cause grave illnesses not only in smokers but in people around them. This is because people around a smoker are the passive smokers and are severly affected by smoking. I therefore, stand with the stance that it should be declared illegal and serious measures should be taken by governments to control and quiet this habit among people.

Medical researches around the globe have proven that smoking can cause one of the deadliest disease that is cancer. It can lead to cancer of mouth and respiratory organs specially lungs. Hence, one should not opt killing himself / herself.

Other than cancers, smoking is a major cause of cardiovascular diseases. It is again asserted in different research studies that a large proportion of people with cardiovascular diseases have history of smoking. Thus, to safeguard our population it should be prohibited by law.

Along with the research studies, I personally experienced that smokers are never healthy irrespective of measures they take for keeping them in a good state of health. They always cough as cigrette irritates mocosal lining of respiratory tract. If you see a coloured picture of a smoker's lungs, you will observe that it is turned black. For educating people about how smoking affects your lungs we can keep some pieces of cotton in fire fumes. Fire fumes turn the cotton black. Similar to this, fumes of smoking turns your lungs black from pink. If a smoker quiets smoking even then it left hazardous effects on him / her.

Consequently, smoking should not be discourged only, it should be punished to save the society. Laws should be made and their execution should be ensured to contain curse of smoking from society, city, province and eventually from the country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you strongly support making smoking illegal, and you address the health risks to smokers and people exposed to second-hand smoke. The discussion of cancer and cardiovascular disease gives relevant reasons, while the personal observation about smokers’ health adds another supporting angle. This is a well-focused response with ideas extended through explanation and examples. However, some claims are broad or insufficiently qualified, such as “smokers are never healthy,” and the cotton-and-smoke comparison is not strong evidence for the claim that smoking turns lungs black. To strengthen the argument further, acknowledge a counterargument—such as personal freedom or the difficulty of enforcing a ban—and explain why your position outweighs it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your position, the body paragraphs present health-related reasons, and the conclusion restates your recommendation. Linking expressions such as “Hence,” “Other than,” “Thus,” and “Consequently” help signal the progression. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some movement towards more flexible cohesion. However, several transitions feel formulaic, and the long paragraph beginning “Along with the research studies” combines personal observation, a visual comparison, and a recommendation without clearly separating these points. References such as “it” in “it left hazardous effects” are also not fully clear. Use more precise links between claims and evidence, and divide or sequence the final body paragraph’s ideas more carefully.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-specific vocabulary, including “passive smokers,” “cardiovascular diseases,” and “respiratory tract,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, the range and control are limited by repeated general terms such as “smoking,” “people,” and “research,” as well as noticeable spelling and word-choice errors. Examples include “severly,” “cigrette,” “mocosal,” “quiet” for “quit,” and “discourged.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “stand with the stance” and “contain curse of smoking.” These errors sometimes make the reader pause, which limits the precision of your message. Build a more accurate set of collocations for discussing public health and policy, and proofread spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures such as “This is because…” and conditional phrasing such as “If you see a coloured picture…”. The main argument remains understandable, but control is inconsistent, particularly in longer sentences. For example, “I therefore, stand with the stance” has awkward punctuation, and “If a smoker quiets smoking even then it left hazardous effects on him / her” has problems with clause structure and tense. There are also issues with articles and agreement, as in “one of the deadliest disease,” and punctuation around introductory phrases. Aim to make complex sentences more controlled: check that each clause has a clear subject and verb, maintain consistent tense, and review articles, plurals, and comma placement.

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