Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Smoking is a main source of major diseases and therefore should be prohibited by governments.I strongly agree with the above statement and this essay will cover how smoking adversly affect human health and causes some major diseases such as cancer,fast aging and depression.It will also cover how making smoking illegal reduces its consumption and will prevent people from its harsh affects.

Smoking is the main cause of many ilnesses such as cancer,anxiety,skin and heart problems.The most prominent disadvantage of smoking is that it is addictive. When a person smokes,the niccotine in ciggeretes releases dopamines that will make a person temporrarily happy.However due to its temporry affect the person smoking it becomes addictive and his body wants more and more of it.Hence it becomes very difficult to stop smoking.For instance a journal on human health concluded that chances of cancer and other heart diseases in chain smokers are 20 percent more as compared to non smokers.

Making smoking illegal will have a huge impact on lowering its overall consumption.This will make it hard for consumers and suppliers to purchase and sell it.Moreover the fear of heavy fines and punishments will prevent its usage among new smokers and overall demand decreases gradually.For example , the smoking rate in ethiopia reached to its minimum in 2019 and the main reason for its decline was banning the sale and purchase of ciggerets by the government.

In conclusion due to harsh affects of smoking such as cancer,depression and other health diseases on public health I completely agree with the idea of making it illegal, since it prominantly reduces its usage and consumption.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction (“I strongly agree”) and remains consistent in the conclusion. You address both the health harms of smoking and the proposed ban, giving relevant examples such as addiction and the claimed decline in smoking in Ethiopia. However, the two main points are not developed equally: the health paragraph explains nicotine and addiction, but the link between these points and the specific illnesses listed could be clearer. The argument for prohibition also assumes that bans reduce use without considering enforcement or possible drawbacks. Develop each claim with a clearer explanation and make examples more precise and directly connected to your reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two focused body paragraphs and a conclusion. The progression from health effects to the impact of prohibition is easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. This shows solid organisation, with some flexibility in how ideas are connected. At times, however, the links feel mechanical, and the long sequence of ideas in the first body paragraph would benefit from clearer sentence boundaries. The conclusion also repeats the main claims rather than drawing them together. Use referencing and transitions more naturally, and organise each paragraph around one central claim followed by explanation and evidence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “addictive,” “consumption,” “nicotine” and “demand,” and you attempt more specific language such as “temporarily” and “prominent.” However, spelling errors are noticeable, including “adversly,” “ilnesses,” “ciggeretes” and “prominantly,” and some word combinations are inaccurate or unnatural: “harsh affects,” “fast aging” and “releases dopamines.” These errors reduce precision, even though the main meaning is generally understandable. Build accuracy by checking spelling carefully and learning common collocations for health and policy topics. Prefer precise, natural phrases over repeated general terms such as “major diseases” and “usage.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause (“that will make a person temporarily happy”) and a conditional structure (“the fear of heavy fines and punishments will prevent its usage”). The overall meaning is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in agreement and sentence construction: “smoking adversly affect” should use a singular verb, while “the person smoking it becomes addictive” does not express the intended relationship clearly. Several sentences also run ideas together, for example the opening sentence and the explanation of nicotine’s effects. Improve control by checking subject–verb agreement, using clear clause boundaries, and varying sentence structures without joining too many ideas in one sentence.

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