Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

smoking causing serious illnesses among the population and should it be made illegal in countries

to somewhat extent smoking does cause serious health risks which is concerning and is increasing at rates which is also effecting minors, therefore smoking should be fined or even made illegal by the authorities especially for minors since the accessiblity of ciggarettes have been made way too easy especially vapes and nicotin pouches which are also harmful for the teens in developmental stage where it can cause alarming illness and damage to the dopamine center of the brain which is linked to the reward center in our brain and smoking causes it to get overstimulated and makes it harder for people and teens to quit.

Moreover, the affects of such products are dangerous with the recent researches coming forward people should be amde aware of such products. But people should also understand the reasons behind why people smoke there are many reason but majority of the causes are high stress,depression,coping mechanism these are also caused due to the high expections placed teens and high stress of jobs and family stress that people go through on a day to day basis which cause them to cope with such situations by smoking which they think reduces stress but infact it actually does the opposite it increases cortisol and after repeated exposure to smoking the brain is so addicted to smoking that it links smoking with a temporary relief from the societal pressure, stress and expectations. So to some extent smoking should be dealt with but the authourites should also undertstand the reason behind smoking.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the health risks of smoking and the potential for it to be made illegal. However, the position is somewhat inconsistent; while you argue for a ban, you also suggest that authorities should understand the reasons behind smoking, which weakens the clarity of your stance. The ideas regarding the impact on minors and the neurological effects of nicotine are relevant, but the essay lacks a clear structure, such as an introduction and a conclusion, which makes the overall argument feel underdeveloped. To improve, ensure you clearly state your position in an introduction and maintain that focus throughout the essay, providing more balanced support for your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear paragraph structure, consisting of only two long blocks of text. The transition between the health risks of smoking and the psychological reasons for smoking is abrupt. While some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'therefore' are used, the overall flow is hindered by the lack of clear topic sentences and logical progression. The absence of a formal introduction and conclusion makes the essay feel like a collection of thoughts rather than a cohesive argument. To improve, use clear paragraphing to separate distinct ideas and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic, using terms like 'developmental stage', 'overstimulated', and 'cortisol'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'ciggarettes', 'nicotin', 'affects' (used instead of 'effects'), and 'authourites'. Additionally, some word choices are slightly imprecise, such as 'accessiblity of ciggarettes have been made way too easy'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they do impact the overall quality of the writing. Focusing on accurate spelling and more formal collocations will help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that affect readability. For example, the opening sentence is a fragment rather than a complete sentence. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'the accessiblity of ciggarettes have been made', and punctuation errors, particularly the lack of full stops between independent clauses, leading to run-on sentences. While you attempt to use complex structures to explain the link between stress and smoking, the lack of control over basic grammar and punctuation limits the clarity of your expression. Focusing on sentence boundaries and basic agreement rules is essential.

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