Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Cigarettes is dangerous for health with that many health issues are become. It damage the human from inside with that many critical illness and it should be banned. I full agree with the given notion that smoking should be made illegal.

Addling the information there are many aspects which damage the body by smoking but the first and foremost one is effects the kidneys. Nowadays, in youngesters smoking is trend everybody are addicted to smoke and all are inhale and exhale vape which is very dangeors for health with that their kidnies are damage and ulcers are in mouth with that they cannot eat properly. Couse the health by these kind of things. Furthermore it is also dangerous for others; For example there is one new born in the family and the other person is addicted to smoke. A smoker need a smoke in every hour. In same home baby smell the fog of smoke and they will get ill easily in everyday basis with that also a chance of died for that child.

Considering the more information the another point is that people make it a trend to do smoking. Government should take some actions on it, that will be banned in the country also many celebrities are promoting these things. People make them a their role model and follow them so celebrity should avoid that things so that country new generation learn many new things not that bad things.

To conclude, government should take action that so that country develop more and though the bad things because with that generation and carrior is in danger.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of banning smoking. However, the development of ideas is limited and often repetitive. While you mention health risks and the impact on others, the arguments lack depth and academic support. For instance, the claim that smoking 'effects the kidneys' is not elaborated upon, and the discussion regarding celebrities is somewhat tangential to the core argument of legality. To improve, focus on providing more structured, logical arguments that directly support your position, ensuring that each paragraph develops a single, clear point with sufficient explanation rather than listing general observations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression of ideas is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and a lack of clear cohesive devices. Transitions like 'Addling the information' and 'Considering the more information' are non-standard and do not effectively link ideas. The internal structure of sentences is often disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of your argument. To improve, use standard linking words such as 'Furthermore,' 'Consequently,' or 'In addition' and ensure that each sentence logically follows the previous one to create a smoother, more coherent narrative.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'dangerous,' 'bad,' and 'things.' There are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'couse the health' and 'carrior is in danger.' Additionally, there are spelling errors like 'youngesters,' 'dangeors,' and 'kidnies.' The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas with precision. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to health and public policy, and practice using synonyms to avoid repeating the same words throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Cigarettes is dangerous,' 'everybody are addicted'), incorrect verb forms ('kidnies are damage'), and sentence structure. The use of complex sentences is rare and, when attempted, often results in errors that obscure the intended meaning. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and correct tense usage. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect pluralization will also significantly improve the clarity and accuracy of your writing.

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